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“That it’s not up to us cats to say who can or can’t get married, and if Gran and Wilbur have decided to engage in the holy sacrament of matrimony, no power on earth can or should come between them, and most definitely not a silly little cat like me.”

“Oh, dear.”

“I said that if Gran decides to get married, I’m going to ask Odelia to adopt me, and Gran can go and live with Wilbur without me.”

I smiled at my friend.“That’s very brave of you, Dooley.”

“Do you think so?”

“Of course. Gran won’t be happy her cat decides not to follow her to her new home.”

“Well, that can’t be helped,” said Dooley with a look of determination in his eyes I’d rarely seen there before. “I’m going to stay with you, Max, and with Brutus and Harriet. We’re the fearsome foursome, and no one is going to separate us—certainly not Wilbur.”

I laughed at the fierceness with which he spoke.“Looks like your mind is made up.”

“Yes, it is. I don’t want to wear flowers in my hair, Max—no way!”

“What about Harriet? She’ll want that tiara, I’m sure.”

“Well, she can have her tiara. And if she wants she can go and live with Wilbur and call Kingman her brother from now on—but not me!”

“Let’s hope she doesn’t,” I said. I didn’t want to break up the band either. And even though Harriet can be a handful sometimes, I would miss her dearly.

“What were you doing outside that shop just now, Max?” asked my friend.

“Oh, just looking. I saw Johnny and Jerry messing about in there, so I just figured I’d see what they were up to.”

“Pete’s Pet Paradise,” he read from the sign on the window. “Are they selling pets?”

“Yeah, looks like. Turtles, mainly, it would seem.” And I told him about the thousands of little turtles in the basement of the shop. “Could be that they’re breeding them and selling them to local seafood restaurants.”

He gave me a look of shock.“Eat turtles! But why, Max?”

I shrugged.“I guess some people like that sort of thing.”

And as we set paw for the park, Dooley reiterated the need for us to break up the upcoming wedding of Gran and Wilbur, and also of Marge and Randy. In other words: we had our work cut out for us.

Chapter 34

As Harriet walked back home, she was experiencing a welter of emotions. On the plus side, she was undoubtedly going to be the star of Gran and Wilbur’s wedding. And with any luck she might be able to pull off the same hat trick at Marge and Randy Hancock’s wedding—and Odelia and Chase’s matrimonial endeavor.

On the minus side of the equation, if Gran did indeed get married, Dooley would have to go and live with her and Wilbur, and even though Dooley annoyed her sometimes, she also loved the silly cat to bits.

Also on the minus side was the fact that Brutus was still missing, and now Max and Dooley had walked out on her, leaving her and Shanille alone to handle the wedding preparations. Then again, wasn’t it always that way: when it came down to it, it was always the women who had to deal with these matters, while the men went down to the bar to have a drink with their buddies.

Though she doubted whether Max and Dooley were at the bar, and neither was Brutus.

She arrived home just in time to see Gran park her car at the curb and get out.

“Gran!” she said. “I’m going to be wearing the nicest, cutest little tiara for your wedding. I’m going to look like the belle of the ball—though I won’t steal your thunder, of course. The bride should always be the center of attention—even I know that.”

Gran looked down at her, a look of confusion on her face.“What are you talking about? What wedding?”

“Why your wedding with Wilbur, of course. It’s going to be just grand. Shanille has a lot of ideas and so have I. So we should definitely get together to discuss them. I’m thinking a nice tux for Wilbur, and white for you. Now I know that white isn’t the obvious choice for one who’s been married before, and has two adult children of her own, but—”

“Harriet, hold on. I specifically told Max and Dooley last night that I’m not getting married—I mean, me? Getting married to that lecherous pipsqueak? Never in my life!”

“But we saw you. We saw you and Wilbur hugging at the store.”

“Yeah, he took me by surprise,” Gran grunted annoyedly. “But I can promise you right now it’ll never happen again. He can apologize until he’s blue in the face, but I’m never going out on a date with that man again, and if he thinks he still has a place in the neighborhood watch he can think again. He’s out.”

“But—”

“Look,” said Gran. “I’m never getting married again, Harriet. I did it once and it didn’t become me. Married life may suit some people, but I’m too attached to my freedom to go and hitch my wagon to a deserving or undeserving male ever again. Got that?”

“But what about my tiara?”

Gran laughed.“You can wear your tiara as much as you want, darling, but it won’t be at my wedding.”

“So maybe I can wear it at Marge and Randy’s wedding?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Chase saw them together. They were buck naked and hugging and Marge was crying tears of joy.”