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“And also, nobody stops with one baby,” said Brutus. “Soon there’s two, then three, and before you know it, there are four or five or six.”

“Six babies!” Dooley cried. “But there’s no space in the house for six kids!”

“Brutus is just kidding,” I said. “I don’t think Odelia and Chase are ready for six kids.”

“Let’s start with just the one,” said Odelia, who’d overheard our conversation.

“So when is the baby arriving, exactly?” asked Dooley nervously.

“Nine months,” I said. “Though now it’s probably a little less than nine months.”

“Nine months,” Dooley murmured. “That’s still a long time, isn’t it, Max?”

“Oh, absolutely. Nine months is like an eternity. Plenty of time for you to get ready.”

“Ready? Why do I have to get ready?” he asked in panicky tones. “Is something terrible going to happen when that baby arrives? Are we going to get kicked out of the house!”

“No, of course not!” said Harriet. “What Max means to say is that you have to get ready psychologically. Get used to the idea of a third person living in the same house with us.”

“A very tiny person,” said Brutus. “So tiny you’ll hardly notice it.”

“Oh, we will notice it,” said Harriet. “Babies might be small, but they take up a lot of space—figuratively speaking. For one thing, they’re very, very loud.”

“Some babies are loud,” I said. “Others are very, very quiet.”

“Let’s hope we get a quiet baby,” said Dooley. He thought for a moment. “If it’s loud, can we return it and get a quiet one instead?”

“I’m afraid not, Dooley,” I said. “You can’t return a baby once you have it.”

“Too bad,” said my friend. “There should be a return policy for babies.”

“Now wouldn’t that be a thing,” said Gran with a sigh. I had the impression she would have returned her son if she’d had the opportunity.

“Quiet, you guys,” said Scarlett. “Look, there’s movement.”

There was definitely movement across the street. Omar, who’d arrived in his own car, a Toyota Corolla, now appeared at the door, looked left and right, then hurried over to his car, drove it into his garage, and quickly closed the garage door again.

“Showtime,” Chase grunted, and got out of the car.

“Let’s go!” said Gran excitedly.

“No, you stay here,” said Chase, and made to close the door.

“Are you kidding me? I’m going,” said Gran.

“It’s not safe, Vesta,” said the stalwart cop.

“It’s my money!”

“It’s not your money, Gran,” said Odelia.

“Oh, but it is. Or at least Bruce’s money. The money he made selling crystal meth.”

“There is no Bruce!” Scarlett reminded Gran. “It’s just a ruse, Vesta!”

“I don’t care. It’s my money, and I’m not letting it out of my sight.”

“Oh, all right,” said Chase. “But you keep out of sight, will you?”

“I’m going to be invisible,” said Gran, ducking down low as she exited the vehicle.

Scarlett and Odelia now made out to exit the car.

“You two better stay put,” said Chase.

“I’m coming,” Scarlett stated decidedly.

“Too right you are,” said Gran. “We’re the neighborhood watch, after all.”

“Best you stay here,” said Chase, addressing his wife. “With the baby…”

“Are you kidding me?” said Odelia. “I’m not staying in the car.”

“But…”

“Is this how it’s going to be from now on? Cause if it is, I’ll tell you right now, mister, that you’re very much mistaken!”

“Oh, fine!” said Chase, and held the door open for his lady love, then helped her out as if she was an invalid. Odelia slapped his hand away, and Chase gave her a nice eyeroll.

Before he could close the door, however, four cats also walked out, causing the big cop to groan in dismay.“This isn’t a sting operation,” he lamented. “This is a family trip!”

“Which is why you need a Volvo!” said Scarlett cheerfully.

“Or a minivan,” Gran added mischievously.

“I amnot getting a minivan,” said Chase through gritted teeth.

“Of course you aren’t,” said Gran, patting him on the back. “You’re getting a Volvo.”

We all stalked across the street, then circled the house and soon found ourselves in Omar Wissinski’s backyard, where we all distributed ourselves amongst the available shrubs, and hunkered down to see what the guy was up to with Gran’s drug money. Though as Odelia had pointed out, it wasn’t Gran’s money, of course. In fact it was Uncle Alec’s money—or rather money the police had recently confiscated from a drug dealer.

We didn’t have long to wait, for soon Omar opened the glass sliding door and came out, carrying Gran’s suitcase as he did. He glanced left, he glanced right, then ventured into the backyard, and as he reached the halfway point between his porch and the end of the yard, he crouched down and seemed to reach into the ground. We heard a sort of clanking sound, and suddenly the grass seemed to tilt up at an angle!

It was some kind of hatch he’d pulled, and moments later the man disappeared into the opening, walking down a staircase, and was soon gone from view. Two arms reached up, took a firm hold of the suitcase and then dragged it down with him and it was gone.

“Bruce’s money!” Gran hissed. “He’s taking it to China!”

“I’m afraid to ask, but why China?” Chase hissed back.