A Dark, Distorted Mirror. Volume 5 : Among the Stars, like Giants. Part 4 : Hopes, Aspirations and Dreams

G'Kar's footsteps were hard and heavy, and blood covered his tunic. The side of his face was matted with his own blood, and there were deep furrows of raw flesh where his eye had once been.

Still, he commanded them by his very presence. Each of them knew they would have let this man rule if only he had wanted to. They remembered the way he had spoken to them the last time he had been here, when he had forced the peace with the Centauri. Here was one whose voice could shake the foundations of the planet.

He walked up to the podium, Da'Kal still helping him. Once there, she stepped back. He was standing tall and majestic, his wounds forgotten.

"We will not fight them," he whispered. He coughed, blood filling his mouth, and then repeated himself, louder and more certain. "We will not fight them.

"They are too strong and too powerful. We will not negotiate. They would not listen. This is not a joke, not a lie, not an illusion. This is reality.

"We have become dark and corrupt. We have been consumed by vengeance until that is all we can see. I tried to teach you...." His voice fell, despairing. "I tried to teach you," he said again, more quietly. "But the truth is that I blame myself for this as much as I blame any of you. I should have seen this more clearly. I wanted to believe we were what I wanted us to be and I could not imagine it any other way.

"I was tired, so very tired, and it was so easy to let the wrongness creep into all our lives. So much easier to let it happen than to fight it, and I did not try to stop what we were becoming.

"Yes, I blame myself, but I blame all of you as well. You were trusted with the leadership of our people and you gave us all to the Darkness in the name of revenge. Behold the price of that revenge.

"We will evacuate this world. Everyone we can. We will save as many as we can, but not the tainted, not those complicit in this.... conspiracy. And none of us will leave. We will all stay and die with our planet. There are not enough ships for us all to depart and I will not see those of us who are guilty leave and live while the innocent remain and die.

"You have doomed our world. All of you. All of us. The least we can do is see that we do not doom our people as well."

"But we can't...." one of them said. "We...."

"We can!" G'Kar spat. "And we will."

"What shall we tell them?" asked another. "What...?"

"We will tell them the truth," G'Kar replied, more softly. "And when they are leaving, to begin their lives as the exiles that we have made them, we will tell them one word.

"Remember."

All were silent, still, motionless. The enormity of what was happening slowly permeated the room.

"We have little time," Da'Kal snapped, breaking the silence. "Let us begin!"

* * *

Moreil rested on one knee before the Chaos-Bringer. He could hardly believe he was in the presence of such a person. He could see now why his Dark Masters had chosen such a one to be the inheritor of their legacy. Truly, this one had been blessed by them from the moment of his birth.

"You are Moreil," the Chaos-Bringer said. "Of the Z'shailyl."

"Yes, lord."

"Why were you with the Brotherhood? What were you seeking?"

"You, lord."

The Chaos-Bringer said nothing. The silence was heavy and oppressive and Moreil continued speaking. "We knew.... all of us knew. When the Dark Masters departed, they offered us the chance to accompany them and serve them in the next world. The Drakh chose to follow. The Zarqheba chose to remain.

"My people, we were unsure. Many wished to leave and remain with our Masters. Some objected that if everyone went, who would pursue the cause of Sacred Chaos here? Surely this galaxy was still important. The Accursed Lords of Order remained. Could they be allowed to triumph? Our Masters must have had their reasons of course, and it is not for us to question."

"And?"

"We concluded this was both a test, and a trap. A test of us, to determine our worth. Could we endure and pursue our cause without their benevolent shadow over us? Had we learned enough to conclude their war?

"And a trap. The Lords of Order would become complacent and weak. There would be weaknesses and opportunities and advantages to be claimed. We would hide and work ourselves into the warp and weave of the galaxy and we would take our chance.

"Some of our people did pass beyond to be with the Masters. The rest of us remained. Some went amongst the Drazi and began to exert influence there. Some became assassins in the shadows of the worlds, shrouded from the eyes of mortals. Others went to Narn, to bargain with their leaders. Some went to search the galaxy for hidden allies and lost relics.

"I and those who follow me came here, to join the disaffected and the rebels. We would become visible. We would sow chaos and misery according to our creed. They would seek to use me, but I could not be used. I did not care about power or wealth or pain or any of their dreams.