Anam Cara

Toward what is difficult,

Painful, and unknown.

May you learn to use this illness

As a lantern to illuminate

The new qualities that will emerge in you.

May the fragile harvesting of this slow light

Help to release whatever has become false in you.

May you trust this light to clear a path

Through all the fog of old unease and anxiety

Until you feel arising within you a tranquillity

Profound enough to call the storm to stillness.

May you find the wisdom to listen to your illness:

Ask it why it came. Why it chose your friendship.

Where it wants to take you. What it wants you to know.

What quality of space it wants to create in you.

What you need to learn to become more fully yourself

That your presence may shine in the world.

May you keep faith with your body,

Learning to see it as a holy sanctuary

Which can bring this night-wound gradually

Toward the healing and freedom of dawn.

May you be granted the courage and vision

To work through passivity and self-pity,

To see the beauty you can harvest

From the riches of this dark invitation.

May you learn to receive it graciously,

And promise to learn swiftly

That it may leave you newborn,

Willing to dedicate your time to birth.

AT THE THRESHOLD OF WOMANHOOD

It is like awakening into a morning

Where everything is touched with change.

Now your body has a mind of its own

As it curves and fills into womanhood.

The lightness of being a girl is leaving,

And your thoughts too are taking you

To places you have never known before.

Becoming a woman, you feel the moon

Tug at your blood, and you begin to sense

The mysteries of your new body.

May you enter beautifully into the feminine,

Learning to trust the world of feeling you inherit,

Finding ease and elegance in all you are.

May your respect for your beauty

Become visible in your dignity

And how you hold yourself in the world.

May the expectation in other eyes

Never decide how you are to be;

Learn to trust the advice of your heart.

May you feel life as an irresistible invitation

To discover and develop your talents,

Each day bringing something new to birth.

May you be wise in choosing love;

When you trust, give all your heart

And allow love to pervade you like breath.

May you have friends who can see you.

May your senses be windows of wonder

And your mind a prism of spirit.

AT THE THRESHOLD OF MANHOOD

As you leave the blurred wood

You entered while still a boy,

And light clarifies around

Your emerging, manly form,

May you discover gradually

A natural confidence in your body.

May your new strength be graceful

As you learn to carry yourself

With a dignity that is sure,

Bringing your gestures and expression

Into an easy harmony and rhythm.

May you never feel the need

To be coarse, or force yourself;

Rather, may you receive your manhood

With grace and mindful ease;

Then, at one with your own elegance,

Your presence will claim its radiance.

May you awaken confidently

To the feminine within you,

And learn to integrate the beauty

Of intuition and feeling

So that your sensitivity kindles

And your heart is trusted.

That you may slowly grow

To trust the silence of the masculine

As the home of your stillness.

Though it will be always difficult

To find the words for what you feel,

May you find ease in that awkwardness

Until gradually from beneath

The gravel of stuttered sounds

The pure flow of you emerges.

Be gentle with yourself,

Learn to integrate the negative,

Harnessing its force

To cross the boundaries

That would confine you.

Love the life of your mind,

Furnishing it ever with new thought

So that your countenance glows

With the joy of being alive.

Be vigilant

And true to an inner honor

That will not allow

Anger or resentment

To make you captive.

Always have the courage

To change, welcoming those voices

That call you beyond yourself.

Beyond your work and action,

Remain faithful to your heart,

For you to deepen and grow

Into a man of dignity and nobility.

FOR THE PARENTS OF ONE WHO HAS COMMITTED A CRIME

No one else can see beauty

In his darkened life now.

His image has closed

Like a shadow.

When people look at him,

He has become the mirror

Of the damage he has done.

But he is yours;

And you have different eyes

That hold his yesterdays

In pictures no one else remembers:

Waiting for him to be born,

Not knowing who he would be,

The moments of his childhood,

First steps, first words,

Smiles and cries,

And all the big thresholds

Of his journey since…

He is yours in a way

No words could ever tell;

And you can see through

The stranger this deed has made him

And still find the countenance of your son.

Despite all the disappointment and shame,

May you find in your belonging with him

A kind place, where your spirit will find rest.

May new words come alive between you

To build small bridges of understanding.

May that serenity lead you beyond guilt and blame

To find that bright field of the heart

Where he can come to feel your love

Until it heals whatever darkness drove him

And he can see what it is he has done

And seek forgiveness and bring healing;

May this dark door open a path