Английский язык с Джеромом К. Джеромом. Трое в лодке, не считая собаки

The quaint back streets of Kingston, where they came down to the water's edge, looked quite picturesque in the flashing sunlight, the glinting river with its drifting barges, the wooded towpath, the trim-kept villas on the other side, Harris, in a red and orange blazer, grunting away at the sculls, the distant glimpses of the grey old palace of the Tudors, all made a sunny picture, so bright but calm, so full of life, and yet so peaceful, that, early in the day though it was, I felt myself being dreamily lulled off into a musing fit.

I mused on Kingston, or "Kyningestun," as it was once called in the days when Saxon "kinges" were crowned there. Great Caesar crossed the river there, and the Roman legions camped upon its sloping uplands. Caesar, like, in later years, Elizabeth, seems to have stopped everywhere: only he was more respectable than good Queen Bess; he didn't put up at the public-houses.

She was nuts on public-houses, was England's Virgin Queen (она обожала трактиры, эта королева-девственница Англии; to be nuts on — быть без ума от чего-либо; nuts — сумасшедший, чокнутый). There's scarcely a pub of any attractions within ten miles of London (едва ли существует /хоть один/ более-менее привлекательный трактир в радиусе десяти миль от Лондона; attraction — привлекательность, притягательность) that she does not seem to have looked in at (в который она бы не заглянула), or stopped at, or slept at, some time or other (/где/ бы не остановилась или не поспала = не провела ночь когда-нибудь; to sleep). I wonder now, supposing Harris, say, turned over a new leaf (я спрашиваю себя теперь, предполагая, что /если/ бы Гаррис, скажем, начал новую жизнь: «перевернул новую страницу»), and became a great and good man, and got to be Prime Minister, and died (и стал значительным и добропорядочным человеком, и попал в премьер-министры, и умер), if they would put up signs over the public-houses that he had patronized (повесили ли бы доски на трактирах, которые он посещал, /с надписями/; sign — знак, вывеска, свидетельство; to patronize — опекать; быть постоянным покупателем, посетителем): "Harris had a glass of bitter in this house (Гаррис выпил стакан горького /пива/ в этом доме);" "Harris had two of Scotch cold here in the summer of `88 (Гаррис выпил две /рюмки/ холодного шотландского /виски/ летом 1888 года);" "Harris was chucked from here in December, 1886 (Гарриса вышвырнули отсюда в декабре 1886 года)."

No, there would be too many of them (нет, было бы слишком много досок)! It would be the houses that he had never entered that would become famous (трактиры, в которые он не входил, стали бы знаменитыми). "Only house in South London that Harris never had a drink in (единственная таверна в южном Лондоне, в которой Гаррис никогда не пил)!" The people would flock to it to see what could have been the matter with it (люди бы валили толпами туда, чтобы посмотреть, в чем же там дело; flock — стадо, толпа; to flock — стекаться, приходить толпой).

virgin [ˈvǝ:ʤɪn] patronised [ˈpætrǝnaɪzd] famous [ˈfeɪmǝs]

She was nuts on public-houses, was England's Virgin Queen. There's scarcely a pub of any attractions within ten miles of London that she does not seem to have looked in at, or stopped at, or slept at, some time or other. I wonder now, supposing Harris, say, turned over a new leaf, and became a great and good man, and got to be Prime Minister, and died, if they would put up signs over the public-houses that he had patronised: "Harris had a glass of bitter in this house;" "Harris had two of Scotch cold here in the summer of `88;" "Harris was chucked from here in December, 1886."