Английский разговорный шутя. 100 анекдотов на все случаи жизни

The farmer, watching all of this with disbelief, cried out, «Stop, Randy, you\'ll kill yourself.» But Randy continued, seeking out each farm animal in the same manner.

Well, the next morning, the farmer looked out and saw Randy lying there on his lawn. His legs were up in the air, his eyes rolled back, and his long tongue hanging out. A buzzard was already circling above Randy.

The farmer walked up to Randy saying, «Oh you poor thing, look what you did, you\'ve gone and killed yourself. I warned you, my little buddy.»

«Shhhhh!» Randy whispered. «The buzzard\'s getting closer.»

Study the words and expressions given below:

to service обслуживать; зд. с.-х. огуливать, топтать, покрывать

rooster петух

vendor продавец

horny рогатый; зд. сленг озабоченный, похотливый

pep сленг энергичный

stuff зд. работа, работенка

strut ходить с гордым, напыщенным видом

furious яростный

to mount взбираться

squawk пронзительно кричать, верещать

feathers перья

frantic неистовый, разъяренный

расе скорость, темп

buzzard сарыч

buddy сленг приятель

he wanted to have his hens serviced он хотел, чтобы его кур покрыли (have sth done букв. устроить так, чтобы кто-то сделал что-л. для тебя)

to set sb loose освободить кого-л., дать кому-л. волю

to give sb a little talk поговорить с кем-л.

to count on sb рассчитывать на кого-л.

there was much squawking было много кудахтанья

to have one\'s way with покончить с кем-л.

to finish having закончить делать что-л.

in the same manner тем же способом, в той же манере

to roll back закатить (глаза)

to get closer приблизиться

Exercises to the text

1. Answer the questions to the text:

1. Why did the farmer go to the market?

2. What sort of a rooster did he want to have?

3. What did the farmer tell Randy before setting him loose?

4. Where did Randy go after he had finished his way with the hens?

5. What was the farmer afraid of?

6. What did the farmer think when he saw Randy lying on the lawn?

7. What do you think Randy would do after he had finished with the buzzard? Don\'t you think the farmer is in danger?

2. Fill in the blanks with the words from the text:

1. A farmer wanted to have his hens _______.

2. He was hoping he could get a _______ rooster.

3. Before setting him _______, he gave him a little talk.

4. He mounted all the horses at the same _______ pace.

5. In the pighouse he did _______.

6. His legs were _______ in the air, his eyes rolled_______.

7. A buzzard was already _______ above Randy.

8. The buzzard\'s _______ closer.

3. Say if the statement is true or false:

1. A farmer wanted to have his pigs serviced.

2. Randy here is the horniest rooster you will ever see.

3. So the farmer took Randy to the farm.

4. Before setting him loose, he had a long talk with Randy.

5. Having finished his way with each hen, Randy stopped.

6. The farmer, watching all of this, cried out, «O.K., Randy, carry on!»

7. A buzzard was circling above Randy.