Best Laid Plans: A Summer Camp Swingers Novel

“Sometimes it feels like it.” She wasn’t usually a sour person—my own general optimism came from her, after all—but she brooded about it for a moment. (My occasional moodiness came from her as well, but I digress.) She eventually took a deep breath and visibly relaxed. “You’ve changed so much lately.”

“Healthy living,” I said in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“That isn’t what I mean. You’ve grown up.”

I gave her my usual smart aleck reply, “Had to happen sooner or later.”

“Will you be serious for a minute.”

“About what?”

“You. Your life. Me. Mine.”

I suddenly grew concerned. “What’s the matter? Everything okay?”

“Yes, but I’m trying to have a serious conversation, and you keep trying to lighten the mood.”

“Okay,” I said slowly. “But for a while there it seemed like you were trying to darken it.”

“I guess I was,” she admitted. “I’m just… wondering where you think things are going with you and Christy.”

“And that put you in a dark mood?”

“No!” She stopped and thought about it. “Okay, maybe a little.”

“Why?”

“I guess I’m feeling old lately. Erin’s growing up and headed to college. You’re growing up and in a serious relationship, maybe an official one.”

“Don’t worry, we’re still a long way from the altar.”

“I know. But it sounds like that’s where you’re headed.”

“I think so.”

She nodded.

“That doesn’t make you old, though.”

“Tell that to my gray hairs.”

I laughed. “Mom, you’re more beautiful now than ever.”

She forced a smile.

“Seriously. Besides, guys are looking at… um… other things. Not gray hairs.”

“Well, I notice them.”

“You’re too critical,” I said, although I laughed at a sudden memory.

“What?”

“Christy, a couple of weeks ago. She was doing her nightly lotions and potions when she stopped and stared at herself in the mirror. She actually lifted her breasts to see how much they sagged.”

Mom’s eyebrows rose.

“Yeah,” I said aloud. “She’s twenty.”

“And a B-cup.”

“A firm B-cup at that. But still, she worries about her looks too. So I understand why you do. I guess most women do it. I mean, it’s a double standard. Society says men get more handsome as we get older. While women—”

“Turn haggard and gray.”

“Oh, please!” I rolled my eyes for effect. “You’re a beautiful woman, still in your prime.”

“Middle-aged prime.”

“I’d do you,” I said before I realized it. All of a sudden my cheeks flushed and I wanted to crawl into a hole.

“Oh, Paul!” she laughed. “You should see your face.”

“Fine,” I grumbled. “Make fun of me for a moment of weakness.”

“Thank you, honey,” she said, although her eyes still crinkled with laughter. “That’s very kind of you. But we have rules about that sort of thing.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Besides, you’re in a serious relationship now.”

“I know, but…”

“But…? It isn’t that serious?”

“Oh, it’s serious all right. And I think Christy will eventually be a swinger, but…”

She waited while I gathered my thoughts.

“I guess I’m a little frustrated. We still haven’t gone all the way.”

Her eyebrows flew up. “But… you live together. She moved in with you, right? So you sleep together every night.”

“She did and we do. But we still haven’t had sex.”

“Why not?”

“Long story. The short version is…” I took a deep breath and sighed. “She doesn’t have a lot of experience. Although… that isn’t true. She has experience, but not with sex. Well, not with intercourse. In other ways she’s pretty open-minded and even more open to… um… ‘experimentation.’”

Mom’s eyebrows rose again. “Which means…?”

“She’s pretty wild. In bed. Not swing-from-the-rafters wild, but a lot wilder than I originally gave her credit for. She and I… like a lot of the same things.”

“I think I understand.” She knew me a lot better than most mothers knew their sons. Not only from Susan—her best friend and my first lover—but also from personal experience.

“Right,” I agreed. “She really enjoys giving head.”

“And you enjoy receiving it.”

“Duh. Who doesn’t? But it’s more than that.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. She understands some of my other… um… kinks.”

“We aren’t talking about swinging, are we?”

“No. A bit more… taboo.”

She knew the code word too.

I almost chuckled that neither of us would say “incest” aloud, but we both knew what we were talking about.

“And she’s okay with it?”

“Yeah, I know,” I said in disbelief. “It blew me away.” I let my words hang in the air. “This friend, Brooke—”

“The one she’s seeing in San Diego? Whose boyfriend broke up with her?”

“Right, her. She opened Christy’s eyes quite a bit, back in high school. They used to read letters in Penthouse Variations and talk about their own fantasies. Christy never admitted to hers, but Brooke did.”

“And they’re more than just friends?”

“Exactly. So I couldn’t really say no when Brooke asked her to come spend time with her.” I grimaced. “No matter how much I wanted to.”

“Oh?”