Braun, Lilian Jackson - The Cat Who 009

Sue Urbank said, “It’s a funny thing. I didn’t see a single visitor last summer, but this year they’re out there almost every night.” “We can expect abnormal weather-with all that activity over the lake,” Dottie predicted.

Qwilleran continued to stare at them with disbelief.

Mildred observed his reaction and said, “Shall I phone you, Qwill, some night around two o’clock when they come around?”

“That’s kind of you,” he said, “but I need all the beauty sleep I can get.”

During the small talk Russell Simms was silent, staring at her plate and chewing slowly. Once Qwilleran glanced suddenly in her direction and caught her studying him from the corner of her eye. He preened his moustache.

Urbank said, “Did everyone read their horoscope this morning? Mine said I’d make a wise investment, so I went out and bought a new set of clubs.”

“Mine said I should cooperate with my mate,” said the attorney. .”Unfortunately I don’t have one at the moment. Any volunteers?”

Bushy said, “Today’s Fluxion told me to go out and have a good time. The Rampage told me to stay home and get some work done.”

“I don’t read horoscopes,” Compton announced.

“That’s true,” said his wife. “I have to read them to him while he’s shaving.”

“Lyle, I always knew you were a hypocrite,” said Doc.

“A hypocritical superintendent is more to be trusted than a painless dentist,”

said Compton. “Never trust a dentist who doesn’t hurt.”

“Qwill, what’s your sign?” asked Mildred.

“I don’t think I have a sign,” he said. “When the signs were handed out, I was overlooked.”

Three persons asked his birthdate and decided he was a Gemini on the cusp of Taurus. Mildred said it would be an interesting year for Gemini. “You can expect the unexpected,” she added.

When coffee was served and guests returned to the deck, Compton wandered down to the beach to smoke a cigar. Qwilleran followed him and said, “Doc is a great kidder.”

“He’s good at shooting the breeze,” Compton said, “but if you want your teeth fixed, you might better go to an auto mechanic.”

“How did you react to all that chatter about UFOs and horoscopes?”

“Don’t expect any rational conversation from this beach crowd,” said the superintendent. “They’re all intelligent folks, but they get a little giddy when they come up here. Must be something in the atmosphere.”

“I assume Captain Phlogg never comes to any of these parties.”

“No, he’s an antisocial fellow. He has a big dog that wanders around the dunes like the hound of the Baskervilles, and I’ve got my shotgun loaded. If I ever catch him doing his business on my beach, he’s going to get it! Right between the eyes!”

Qwilleran said, “I opened a can of worms when I mentioned building an addition.”

“You don’t really intend to do it, do you?”

“I’m badly in need of more space. The cabin is okay for weekends or a brief vacation, but it’s inadequate for the whole summer. Did you ever hire an underground builder?”

“About two months ago,” said Compton. “He poured a slab for a two-car garage and roughed it in, and then he never came back. I’ve done everything but hire a private detective. He was one of the itinerants who come up here during the resort season, you know, and the only way I could get hold of him was to leave a message at the Shipwreck Tavern. They haven’t seen him for five weeks, and we’re sitting there with a half-built garage. Can’t get anyone else to finish the damn thing.”

“This is not very encouraging,” Qwilleran said.

“You have to live through it to believe it.”

“Someone mentioned Mighty Lou …”

“Forget him! You may have seem him swaggering around town-a weight lifter who thinks he’s a builder. He has a fortune in tools, but he doesn’t know which end of the nail to hit.”

“How does he make a living?”

“He doesn’t need to make a living. His family used to own all the sandpits in the county.’”

There was a spectacular sunset-a ball of fire sinking into the lake and turning it blood red. Then the mosquitoes swooped in, and the guests went indoors to play cards. Qwilleran suggested to Mildred that they leave.

“Let’s go home and make a sundae,” she said. “I’m still hungry. Do you realize there were thirteen of us at that party? That’s unlucky.”

“We’ll all get food poisoning from the potato salad,” Qwilleran predicted cheerfully. “Did you get a chance to talk to the young woman in the white dress?

Her first name is Russell. She acts like a sleepwalker.”

“I don’t know what she’s all about,” Mildred said. “Did you see her eyes when she took off her sunglasses? Weird!”

“Maybe she landed from one of your extraterrestrial aircraft.”

“You don’t believe in the visitors,” Mildred reproached him. “But just wait till you see one!” When they got to Mildred’s” she served homemade French vanilla ice cream with strawberries and a sprinkling of something crunchy. “What do you think of the topping?”

“It looks like dry catfood,” he said, “but it’s good!”

“It’s my homemade cereal-wonderful in the morning with milk and sliced bananas.

What do you eat for breakfast, Qwill?”