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“Wouldn’t you like to experience a beautiful day like this for yourself?”

Subtlety has never been Harriet’s strong suit, I’m afraid.

“Um…” said Brutus, extremely ill at ease and watching his every step.

“We could invite cat choir to provide the musical background at the ceremony, and I’m sure Shanille could wrangle Father Reilly into providing the venue.”

“Father Reilly will never agree to organize a cat wedding at his church,” I said, feeling that I probably should come to Brutus’s aid before he collapsed into a welter of emotion.

“And why not, may I ask?” Harriet snapped, visibly peeved at my lack of endorsement. “For your information, Father Reilly adores Shanille. She told me so herself. ‘There’s nothing Father Reilly wouldn’t do for me,’ she told me just the other day. Nothing.”

“She probably meant there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for her in the food department,” I said. “But he’d probably stop short of lending his church to a bunch of cats deciding they want to organize a wedding.”

“And why is that? Don’t you think we have as much right to get married as the next human?”

“That’s just it, Harriet,” I said. “We’re not humans, are we? And Father Reilly is.”

“I’m sure Father Reilly would love to organize a cat wedding,” said Dooley, intervening on Harriet’s behalf. “Father Reilly is all about trying new things. To bring some life back into his congregation. And a cat wedding is just the ticket,” he added.

“See?” said Harriet with a note of triumph in her voice. “Even Dooley thinks we should get married. Thank you, Dooley,” she said emphatically, giving me a nasty look as she spoke these words. “I always thought you were a lot smarter than you look.”

“Why, thanks, Harriet,” said Dooley, well pleased with this dubious compliment.

“You’re welcome. So let’s get this wedding on the road, yummy bear,” she said, giving her mate a nudge in the midsection, causing the latter to wince as if in great pain.

When I gave Dooley a slightly hurt look, he blinked and said,“What?”

“You shouldn’t encourage Harriet, Dooley,” I whispered into his ear.

“Why not?” he whispered back. “She wants to have her most beautiful day, just like Odelia. And I think there’s nothing more important than making people happy, Max.”

“Oh, Dooley,” I said. “Not again with this ‘Good deed of the day’ nonsense.”

“It’s not nonsense, Max,” he said. “Millions of cub scouts are making people happy every day. Is it so wrong of me to join them? Spread a little sweetness and light?”

“No, Dooley,” I said. “There’s nothing wrong with spreading sweetness and light. But sometimes what’s beautiful for one cat is a disaster waiting to happen for another.”

I would have explained to him a thing or two about the concept of the bridezilla, and how I had the distinct impression that Harriet had all the makings of the worst bridezilla that had ever lived, but just then Odelia and Chase were starting to intone their vows, and so I wisely shut up and listened.

After all, maybe there was a section in there devoted to us cats, and I wouldn’t want to miss my cue for when to break into raucous applause now would I?

2

O delia’s eyes were sparkling as she gazed softly into those of her future husband—a future that could be counted in minutes now, not hours, as those fateful two words were about to be spoken, perhaps the most beautiful words in the English language: ‘I do.’

She’d prepared her vows ages ago, as any person working as a professional word slinger would, and she now took out the little piece of paper she’d tucked safely away in a hidden corner of her wedding dress—actually her mother’s wedding dress. And even though it was one gorgeous gown, it still felt a little like a letdown. Especially the strange smell was hard to ignore. It was a combination of mothballs and that stale stench that hits you when you open an old closet you haven’t seen the inside of in years.

There hadn’t been time to get the dress dry-cleaned or washed so Mom had sprayed the thing with plenty of Febreze and even a whiff of some very expensive perfume, but even now the smell assaulted Odelia’s nostrils and made her feel a little nauseous.

It had been a wedding fraught with obstacles, though when in later years she looked back upon this day she’d probably laugh and laugh and laugh. At least she hoped she would.

There had been some issues with the wedding rings, unfortunately, as the jeweler they’d selected to provide them with the gorgeous gems for this very special occasion had read an article in the Gazette announcing that the wedding was off, and had decided to sell their wedding rings to another, more deserving, couple. At least he felt they were more deserving, as he’d gone to great pains to explain, since they were actually getting married and Odelia and Chase obviously were not—at least according to the Gazette.