Fading Echoes

“And take one to Mousefur as soon as you get a chance,” he added. “She’s still very upset.”

“Right.” Brightheart ducked away toward the medicine den.

Jayfeather wanted to check on the elder himself before he left. He slid into the apprentices’ den, where Purdy and Mousefur were crouched in thickly padded nests.

“It was my fault,” Mousefur was muttering. “All my fault.”

Purdy forced a loud purr. “I bet he’s walking with StarClan now,” he mewed. “Hunting in lush forest, warm and happy.”

“How will he manage without me to guide him?” Mousefur fretted.

“I wish I’d known him longer,” Purdy pressed on. “I heard he made the Great Journey while he was blind.”

“He never seemed to get tired.” Memory distracted the old she-cat for a moment. “Always first up and ready to move on. Never afraid of what lay ahead.”

“What was he like before he lost his sight?” Purdy prompted.

“Eyes like a hawk,” Mousefur remembered. “Could spot prey under a rock a tree-length away.”

Jayfeather felt Purdy’s gaze flit over his pelt. For the first time, Jayfeather thanked StarClan for the garrulous old loner.

“Tell me about his best catch,” Purdy urged Mousefur. “I hear he once caught an eagle.”

“Well, it wasn’t exactly an eagle, though he did fight off an owl when it tried to snatch a kit.”

Relieved, Jayfeather backed out of the den.

As he neared the barrier, branches swished. Cloudtail and Brackenfur were heaving them up against the ragged thornbush.

“Wait!” Squirrelflight was hurrying after him. “Sandstorm told me to accompany you to ShadowClan’s camp.”

“I’m going to speak to Littlecloud.” Jayfeather didn’t turn to greet the orange warrior before he ducked through a gap in the barrier.

She hurried after him but kept a few paces behind as they headed into the forest. The wind was cold: the first promise of leaf-bare. Jayfeather shivered, then jumped as a tree creaked beside him. He had never considered the fragility of the trees before. They stood so strong and tall. How could rain have defeated one?

Squirrelflight quickened her pace and fell in beside him. “It’s not right to fear the forest.”

“It’s not right for a tree to crush the camp,” Jayfeather growled. “But it did.”

Squirrelflight moved a little farther away and padded on in silence. Jayfeather relished the tension sparking between them if it meant she would keep her distance. He had not been alone with the cat who had raised him since the truth came out: that she had lied to him and his littermates all their lives, that she wasn’t their mother at all, but their mother’s sister.

“I remember when you, Lionblaze, and Hollyleaf were still kits,” Squirrelflight meowed suddenly.

Jayfeather stiffened.

“A leaf landed on Hollyleaf’s head. She thought the forest was falling and hid in the nursery and wouldn’t come out for three days.”

Shut up! Jayfeather flattened his ears.

“I couldn’t have loved you more,” Squirrelflight murmured.

Anger flashed through his pelt. “If you’d really loved us, you wouldn’t have lied!”

Squirrelflight bristled. “Well, the truth is just great, isn’t it!” She whipped her tail though the air. “Look at Leafpool. She’s lost everything she ever cared about.”

“Her choice,” muttered Jayfeather.

Squirrelflight ignored him. “She lost you, Lionblaze, and Hollyleaf.”

“She gave us away.”

“Other cats have been hurt too!” Squirrelflight snapped. “This was never just about you, and I’m sick of you flapping your wings like an injured sparrow, feeling oh so sorry for yourself. You’re not the only cat suffering. Your pain is not the hardest to bear. I suppose I expected more from you because you’re the medicine cat; I suppose I forget how young you are!”

As she lectured him, Jayfeather’s rage spiraled alongside hers. “Leafpool made this happen. I didn’t go looking for mates in another Clan. I didn’t have kits and give them away! I didn’t lie and let every cat think I was something I wasn’t!”

Squirrelflight drew in a long breath and let it out slowly. “Try to remember,” she meowed quietly, “that we did what we thought was best. Remember that you were always loved.”

Yeah, right.

Border markers crossed their path.

Jayfeather padded past them.

“Wait,” Squirrelflight ordered.

Jayfeather dug his claws into the ground. Was she going to argue with everything he did or said? They had to speak with Littlecloud as soon as possible! But he waited while she tasted the air, her paws shifting the needles on the forest floor as she scanned the woodland.

“Patrol,” she warned.

Jayfeather sniffed, and scented the fresh tang of ShadowClan warriors. Oakfur and Ferretpaw were padding close by.

Squirrelflight hailed the ShadowClan warrior. “Oakfur?”

Jayfeather felt surprise spark from the ShadowClan cats’ pelts. Pawsteps came hurrying.

“So Blackstar was right!” Oakfur growled. “You are trying to invade.”

“Keep your fur on!” Jayfeather realized he was on the wrong side of the border. “I just want to see Littlecloud.”

Ferretpaw swarmed around him, whiskers twitching. Jayfeather stood still and let the young cat sniff.