Family Ties

I hid my confusion and gestured to Christy. “Mom, Erin, this is my girlfriend, Christy. Christy, this is my mother, Beth. And my sister… um…

Erin. Yeah. Duh.”

“You’re such a dweeb,” Erin said.

“Nice to finally meet you, Christy,” my mom said smoothly. “Paul’s told us a lot about you.”

My stomach lurched, and I suddenly understood what Erin had meant. I hadn’t told my family a thing about Christy. I hadn’t even told them I was dating anyone.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Christy said. “Paul’s told me so much about your family.”

I wanted to laugh. Hysterically. Two of the most important women in my life were lying to each other, just so I didn’t look like the jackass that I was.

Mom and Christy made small talk about school and art, and I realized that Wren must have been a major conduit of information to Susan, who’d fed it to my mother.

“Sorry to interrupt,” I said, “but I need to refuel the plane. Hey, Erin…

you wanna come with me?”

“Are you kidding?”

I gave her an insistent look.

“Oh, right,” she said in a monotone. “I’d love to.”

I kissed Christy and left her to talk to my mom. Erin and I headed out to the plane.

“You have to be the worst boyfriend in the world,” she said once we were safely outside. “What were you thinking?”

“I wasn’t,” I said as I bent over the wing and opened the fuel door.

Erin berated me with a sisterly lecture, but I only listened with half my attention.

“Yeah, I know,” I said when she wound down. “I’m a dweeb, a doofus, and a dork. Now, tell me what Mom knows.”

“How should I know? I only got the highlights. And just on the way to the airport, so you wouldn’t look like a total loser.”

“Hold on… Mom and Susan must have talked about her.”

“Probably. But… um… I haven’t been listening as much lately. Like, not at all.”

“Seriously.”

“Seriously. It… didn’t seem right.”

“Don’t tell me you have a newfound respect for Mom’s privacy.”

“So what if I do?”

“Wow, you have changed.” I laughed. “Mom said you had, but… wow.”

“So? We’ve been getting along better since the Night at the Limelight.”

“No kidding.” I grinned at her capital letters. I did the same thing.

“Shut up. And tell me about Christy. She’s totally gorgeous. Wow! And tiny! She’s like a little doll. How much does she weigh? Ninety pounds?”

“About a hundred.”

“What’s she like in bed? Does she like girls?”

“Erin, whoa! You seriously need to get laid, don’t you?”

“Why? Are you offering? Is she into that? Cool.”

I rolled my eyes and closed the fuel tank. “Come on,” I said. “Let’s get back before Mom and Christy run out of lies to tell each other.”

“You really are the worst boyfriend in the world. The only guys I know with brain cells above the waist are taken, but you have girls throwing themselves at you. It isn’t fair.”

Mom smiled when Erin and I returned to the waiting area after I paid for the fuel. Christy was in a good mood too, just short of bouncy.

“We’re fueled and ready to go when you are,” I said. I picked up Mom’s suitcase and a zippered dress bag. I gestured for Erin to hand me hers as well.

The women chatted as we walked out to the plane. I stowed the luggage and then did a quick weight calculation. I didn’t want to come right out and ask how much Mom weighed, so I fudged the numbers on the safe side.

“Would you like to ride up front?” Christy asked her.

“No, but thank you. You can sit with Paul.”

“Actually, it’d make my life easier if you did,” I told Mom. Then I felt the force of three curious looks. “It’d help with trim,” I explained quickly.

“To balance the load.”

“Did you just call us ‘the load’?” Erin said.

“Erin… please can I get a break here?”

“I’ll be happy to ride up front,” Mom said with a smile.

“Yeah, okay. Cool,” Erin said. “Christy and I can talk in the back.”

Mom joined in the conversation before we even took off, and the three of them got to know each other for real. They talked about school, life, and growing up in the Navy. (Mom’s father had been a career officer too.) I flew the plane and kept my mouth shut, even when Mom and Erin started telling

stories from when I was a boy.

Susan met us at the Lancaster County airport. She and my mom hugged and commiserated about Gunny, which made me feel guilty that I’d almost forgotten the reason for the trip. Susan looked like she was holding up well, and she brightened immediately when I introduced Christy.

“Beth’s told me all about you,” Susan lied smoothly.

Erin gave me a pointed I-told-you-so look.

Note to self, I thought, thank Wren too. I owed so many women that I wondered how I’d ever thank them enough.

Mom leaned close. “She’s wonderful.”

“Thanks. And, um… sorry I didn’t mention I was dating.”

“Yes, about that. We need to clarify the ‘no news is good news’ policy.

Good news is actually news.”

“Right. Got it. And thanks for covering for me.”

“Oh, you’re welcome. It’s what I do.”

“Yeah, well, I thought you’d be doing it less as I got older.”

“I’ll always cover for you, honey.”

“Thanks, Mom.” I put my arm around her and squeezed affectionately.