Five Spice Street

‘‘I would comfort him patiently and tell him there was still time for everything. His past mistakes were actually a good thing. He could change to be even stronger and more energetic; he could be indomitable. Without those thirty years of mistakes, there couldn’t be this enlightened person of today. Every one of us has made mistakes. These mistakes become the motor for progress. I think that after this kind of misunderstanding, each of us sees the other’s face clearly. The person I see is no longer a little boy but a charming man. This is very gratifying. The guidance I gave wasn’t in vain. It had the desired effect. From this, you can also see that my feelings for him were virtuous. This defies certain people’s dirty lies. Filled with confidence, I sat in the doorway waiting day after day. I was waiting for the time for our meeting, watching the young guy’s expression become more cloudy and despairing by the day, watching the situation gradually become more favorable for me, watching certain people’s conspiratorial performances. I saw everything. I foresaw everything. I just didn’t guess that he would lift his bag to his back and take off. I didn’t reckon that he would so resolutely end our friendship. Of course, I can also understand his drastic action: this was an unexpected result of the guidance I had given him. After being enlightened, he was ashamed and made up his mind that only by cutting himself off from the past could he adopt this drastic action. It might even be a good thing that he acted this way: it saved us a lot of trouble. Now we can simply write him out of the history with one brushstroke. Because now it is the same as if he had never existed on Five Spice Street. As for the time after he grew up, he went to another place to start over again: this had nothing to do with us. From the point of view of ordinary people, it is fair and reasonable to think this way, but I am a mother. Seeing a newborn infant leave me and go far away to an alien land is not easy to accept. I can tell you that when he disappeared at the end of the street, I even shed tears! He certainly could have stayed here. My door was wide open to him day and night. He could come to me whenever he wanted. Why couldn’t this child think of this? Had a certain person’s spiteful lies reached his ears, and so, to keep people he cared about from being hurt, he decided to sacrifice himself? By contrast, that person looked so filthy and ugly. When this child left, at one stroke he exposed the schemer’s inner world. Under our august gaze, did she still have the courage to make her fallacious arguments? My dear stenographer, when I saw you just now and found that you and I are working for the same cause, I immediately felt more relaxed: I’m not the only one paying attention to this incident. Have you considered that this matter before us is ingenious? If you can record the subtle psychology I just described so brilliantly and eloquently, this will educate and enlighten everyone, and the schemer will be too ashamed to show her face. He certainly isn’t gone forever: do you believe this? If a person falls into this kind of situation, even his own existence becomes problematic. Everyone forgets his name and just calls him by the awkward name ‘X’s husband.’ It was difficult enough for him to stand up again at the spot where he fell, and he also faced other obstacles. He didn’t have time to bare his heart to me and get my protection. So he became temporarily depressed and couldn’t see a way out. In leaving, he was subjectively embracing a self-destructive resolve. Of course, in reality, it can’t turn out this way. My latent influence on him must have determined his whole life. After he got a new life, he made a circuit outside, finally returning to his mother’s side-the only friend he revered-to live out his life. My dear stenographer, after discussing all of this with you, my train of thought has gradually become clear. Isn’t this an astonishing skill? Now I’ve become optimistic about X’s husband’s future. He’s already been transformed from an awkward symbol into a person. After this, he will complete his travel in the outside world, and finally he will throw himself into my embrace. Twenty minutes ago, I had a heavy heart as I watched him leave me, and aged ten years all at once. You saw this yourself. But after only twenty minutes, I’m the same as ever. Now how do I look?’’

The writer told her that she couldn’t look better, that she could absolutely be called ‘‘a budding flower,’’ but that she was even more gorgeous than ‘‘a budding flower.’’ After experiencing her loveliness, no one would be satisfied with those young girls. She was really the epitome of perfection.