Gynecocracy

Beatrice tickled my raw thing with her quill.

Agnes said she would not touch the horrid nasty affair.

Mademoiselle ultimately took pity on me.

That shameful part of me was, of course, prominently exposed to Mademoiselle and her smiling pupils.

I suppose the mad craving which I have heard exists in some men for being whipped by ladies is due to the possession in which it puts those ladies of the private structure of their bodies. It is an anticipation of the delight, resulting from a woman's conquest and control of their animal natures, gained by her in the act of copulation. But it always seemed to me to be founded upon a morbid appreciation of shame, and a morbid delectation in it.

Punishment by and before men would, of course, be a totally different matter.

The mystery of this fleeting evanescent feeling which I could not catch and analyse worried me.

When Mademoiselle spoke to me of being in that condition in the presence of ladies I had the hardihood to remark naively that it was natural I should be in that condition before them!

A peal of laughter greeted this observation.

CHAPTER 19

Under Elise — animals!

At half-past twelve, when lessons were concluded, Elise again made her appearance to claim me as her prisoner and I resigned myself to the inevitable with a sigh and accompanied her with a cowed, hang-dog, crushed, and humiliated feeling in which, in the presence of her petticoats and peeping ankles, I positively, to my surprise, found myself taking a queer sort of delight. It was of the same nature as that sensation caused me when I lay face uppermost between her bare legs, closely pressed to her body, exciting and forced to devour her living raw flesh. How oddly things strike one! I wondered whether this craving and gratification of mine were akin to those which the Israelites experienced in the desert, and which they satisfied with quails.

Logically or illogically, rightly or wrongly, I reflected that they had had the quails. And so I was confirmed in my determination to get any animal satisfaction I could out of Elise. That was not much.

Mademoiselle must have set bounds to it. Elise, Mary, and Susan, all threatened to make me do with them what I had implored Mademoiselle to allow me to do with her, but they never carried out their threat. Elise took me to the workroom. There was a wickerwork-stand there which was used for hanging dresses on while making or finishing them. It resembled half the divine female form, from the waist to the ground. Elise silently grasped me round the waist and inserted her hand under my skirts from behind. I trembled and gasped. I knew what was coming. She pressed her hand against my bottom, pushed it through my legs, caught hold of that affair of mine in front, and violently drew the skin down. I jumped, but could not escape from her grasp.

My petticoats rubbing against my more than nakedness hurt me severely. I changed colour, became pale, and then, a deep flush spread itself over my face. As soon as she had let me go I bent over in anguish, not daring to set myself right.

"Oh, Miss Elise, how severe you are." I did not forget the "Miss" this time.

"Oh," she said triumphantly, "strip yourself, Miss. I will have the maids in to see you like that when I have caged you."

I at once proceeded to undress, cured long ago by her whip, of all idea of hesitating. She then tied my hands behind me with a tape.

"You were elongated this morning, you shall be packed together again now," she continued, unfastening her whip from her waistband where it hung by a spring catch. "Get under that dress stand. At once!"

"Yah! Yah!" as she lashed me. "I will. Stop!"

I huddled myself under the accursed thing as best I could, crouching down, sitting on my haunches. I had obeyed instantly; the lashes were wanton and gratuitous. She padlocked the stand in two places to the floor. I felt like a caged beast. There was that thing of mine in front of me grown to an enormous size, strangulated, and swollen by the stricture of the skin, hurting me horribly as it wagged its raw head under the influence of excitement I could not prevent, and my hands all the time absolutely behind my back.

I felt as monstrous as Priapus, and was literally dismayed at the prospect of being exhibited like that to the gaze, the curiosity, and the ridicule of a number of maidservants, for I did not doubt for an instant that she would execute her threat. I knew the show she intended to make of me would afford her infinite amusement.

In the meantime she inserted the whip between the wicker bars of my prison and diverted herself hugely by poking and tickling me with it. The contact of the whip was most painful against that raw thing, tender and sensitive as it was. Then, raising her skirts, she pressed herself against the bars and made me kiss "Miss Elise" through them again and again. To my horror, she then summoned Mary and Susan; the last I had not seen before.

Mary repeated the poking process after which she minutely examined me.