Kinky Confessions

Christy sighed and stared at her lap. She unconsciously raised one hand to her mouth and sucked the tip of her thumb. I couldn’t help but smile, although I managed to hide it before she caught me. She realized what she was doing and said, “I suppose you think that’s funny.”

“No. But it’s something I want in my life. Not the oral part,” I added hastily, “but the thoughtful part. You’re really trying to understand, and I get it. This isn’t easy for you.”

She shook her head.

“I grew up in a family that was much more open about sex. In this case, it means sex with each other. Not on a regular basis, but still…”

She gazed at me steadily and then nodded.

“Do you still want to hear what happened?”

“Yes.”

“Okay. She’d been thinking about it for a while. But our family has—

had rules about kids and parents. No touching, more or less. Not sexually.

But she and Erin had a big talk over New Year’s, and Erin convinced her that the rules didn’t really make sense anymore, especially now that we’re all adults.”

“And lemme guess,” Christy said with a touch of sarcasm, “Erin has fantasies about your dad.”

“Yes.”

“I should’ve known.”

“You wanted the truth,” I said evenly. “This is it, kinky fantasies and dark secrets and all.”

“Yeah, I get it. Keep going. Erin talked to your mom, and…”

“Convinced her that the rules didn’t make sense anymore. My mom talked to my dad—he knew what had happened between us, back when I was a teenager—and they decided to change the rules. She wasn’t sure anything would happen at all, but then I called and told her our plans had changed and I’d be coming to Atlanta for a few days.

“She didn’t really make the final decision until she talked to me, about us and our relationship. I told her you knew we were swingers. She was…

‘feeling us out,’ I guess you’d say. She didn’t want to throw a bomb into our relationship. Yours and mine, I mean.”

“I knew who you meant. But if this isn’t a bomb, I’d hate to see what she thinks is.”

“No, it isn’t a bomb. You’d’ve run screaming if it were.”

“You can say that again.”

“Right, so… She had a plan and put it into action.” I gave Christy a pointed look. “Sound familiar?”

“Hold on, is that why you’re with me? ’Cause I’m like your mother?”

“No,” I said quickly. “Maybe a little, looks-wise, but you’re totally different in the personality department. You’re… you. And I guess it really boils down to ‘you excite me,’ although not like she does. That was an itch, a fantasy. You’re reality.”

“I don’t know if I really understand,” Christy admitted, “but thank you.”

“You’re welcome. Now, do you want me to keep going?”

“Sort of. I want to know, but I don’t… if that makes sense.”

“It does. So I’ll give you the big details but not the little ones.” I drew a deep breath and plunged ahead. “My parents offered to pay for Erin’s spring break. Then my dad traded trips so he’d be gone too.”

“Leaving just you and your mom. Ah, now I get it. I thought you’d be bored and lonely, but…”

“No. That was her plan. She… um… didn’t want any distractions.” Or awkwardness, I added to myself, in case things hadn’t worked out. “The weather was sunny the day after I came home, so we decided to work in the yard.”

“That part was true? What you told me on the phone?”

“It was all true, but I left out a lot.”

“You can say that again,” she said, but without heat.

“Anyway, we did some nude gardening. You’ve seen our back yard—it’s private. We were flirting and joking around. Then we finished and went to clean up, but my shower was full of houseplants.”

“Part of her plan, I’m sure.”

“Mmm hmm. She wanted me to shower in the master bathroom. One thing led to another, and… we had sex. It was fun, but…” I fell silent until I had her full attention. “It was just sex. It wasn’t like you and me.”

“How d’you mean?”

“Sex with you is more emotional.”

“How do you know? We haven’t had sex. Not for real.”

“You know what I mean. It’s emotional for you too.”

She thought about it for a long moment. She knew I was changing the subject slightly, but she decided to go along with it. “Yeah,” she said at last.

“If I didn’t know before, I’d’ve realized it with Brooke. I love her, don’t get me wrong, but… she isn’t you.”

“And my mom isn’t you,” I agreed. “Neither was that flight attendant today. That’s why I turned her down.”

“I still can’t believe how many women throw themselves at you. It’s enough to make me paranoid.”

“I don’t even notice most of the time.”

“Sure you don’t.”

“Okay, I notice. But I have you, so I don’t do anything with them.”

“Except you did. With your mother.” She rolled her eyes and looked skyward. “I can’t believe I just said that!”

“It was different with her. Like with you and Brooke. They weren’t random people. We each had a relationship with them before.”

“Yes, but I told you about Brooke before I did anything.”

“Mmm hmm. And that’s why I felt guilty… for not telling you. But I was scared too. I wasn’t sure you’d understand.”