Lost Stars

Squirrelflight had insisted on the ThunderClan medicine cats being present for this attempt to cure Bramblestar. She herself had stayed behind in camp to take up her duties as temporary Clan leader, saying that if there was no news by dawn she would come to see for herself. Shadowpaw had guessed that part of her was relieved not to have to witness her mate’s ordeal.

Once he was sure that Bramblestar was settled, Shadowpaw left the snow den and went to sit beside his mother. Dovewing draped her tail protectively over his shoulders. Shadowpaw could see the worry in her eyes; it hadn’t been long since she had been a ThunderClan cat, and Bramblestar her leader.

Then Shadowpaw remembered his mother’s face in the vision he had received of the codebreakers. She and Tigerstar had broken the warrior code by becoming mates. Dovewing had abandoned her Clan.

Will StarClan ever forgive her?

Moonhigh came and went, and Bramblestar only seemed to be getting worse. His chest barely moved with each shallow breath. Alderheart, who was sitting beside him in the snow den, was growing more panicked with every moment that passed. Shadowpaw wished that he could reassure the ThunderClan medicine cat, but fear was growing inside him, too: the fear that he had been terribly wrong, and that his treatment was only hastening Bramblestar’s death.

“He’s too cold!” Alderheart cried out. “Isn’t there anything we can do to warm him?”

“No,” Shadowpaw responded. “The cold is supposed to cure him, letting the sickness work its way out.” He hoped that he sounded more confident than he felt.

Glancing around at the other cats, Shadowpaw could see his own doubt and anxiety reflected in every face. Even Puddleshine was looking uncomfortable.

“We took an oath as medicine cats,” Jayfeather growled. “How can we sit here and watch a cat die? Knowing we’re making him worse?”

“But we knew what would happen here,” Puddleshine replied; Shadowpaw could tell what an effort his words were costing him. “It’s just like when Alderheart cured my infection using deathberries. Bramblestar will get worse before he gets better—isn’t that what the vision said?”

Shadowpaw nodded firmly. “Yes, it did.”

“Then we must trust this young cat, as we all agreed,” Puddleshine meowed. “As Squirrelflight—your own deputy, Jayfeather—agreed.”

Jayfeather’s only response was a scowl, but he made no move toward the den where the ThunderClan leader lay dying.

Shadowpaw closed his eyes, willing StarClan to send him more: another vision, another detail, anything to help convince him that this was right. I’m supposed to help cats avoid death, he thought. But this time, am I chasing a cat toward his death?

Behind his closed eyelids he saw a huge star exploding over the lake, splintering into countless glittering shards, which hung in the sky for a heartbeat and then faded into darkness. There is a darkness in the Clans, he repeated to himself.

Shadowpaw started as he felt some cat jostling him in his side. He opened his eyes to see Puddleshine staring at him. “Are you asleep?” his mentor asked.

Blinking, Shadowpaw realized that the moon was lower in the sky than when he had last seen it. I was asleep—and that must have been a dream.

Jumping up, Shadowpaw padded into the snow den to check on Bramblestar. When he stretched out a paw and laid it gently on his chest, he felt that the ThunderClan leader was as cold as before.

Then an even deeper cold spread beneath Shadowpaw’s pelt and invaded his whole body.

Bramblestar isn’t breathing!

Shadowpaw let out a gasp. Forcing back panic, he rested his paw on Bramblestar’s muzzle, then thumped his paws down on his chest, as if he might startle him back to life. But Bramblestar never stirred. Shadowpaw felt as though all the air had been sucked out of the tiny den, and an agonizing pain pierced his chest, as if claws were trying to rip him apart from the inside.

I killed him—I killed Bramblestar!

Forcing his legs to move, Shadowpaw backed out of the den and turned around. I never thought I would kill him—I never thought he would die! StarClan didn’t warn me. . . .

Puddleshine was standing nearby, searching Shadowpaw’s gaze. Shadowpaw could see his mentor read his expression, and flinched as the hope in Puddleshine’s eyes changed to disappointment.

“Is he gone?” Puddleshine whispered.

Shadowpaw tried to speak, but he found he couldn’t make the words come out of his mouth. But StarClan . . .