Mr. Darcy's Diary

I needed to know, so that I would understand how best to use my time, and how to conduct my own search. I would not rest until Elizabeth’s sister was returned to her.

‘My father is gone to London, and Jane has written to beg my uncle’s immediate assistance, and we shall be off, I hope, in half an hour.’

Half an hour! After all my hopes, to lose Elizabeth so soon, but of course it must be done.

‘How is such a man to be worked on? How are they even to be discovered? I have not the smallest hope. It is every way horrible!’

I could say nothing, do nothing, but give her my silent sympathy and hope it strengthened her. I longed to embrace her, but her uncle would be returning at any minute, and to do so would make the situation worse.

‘When my eyes were opened to his real character. Oh!

Had I known what I ought, what I dared to do! But I knew not. I was afraid of doing too much. Wretched, wretched mistake!’

I knew she must be wanting me gone. It was I who had enjoined her to secrecy; I who had said she must tell no one. And this had been the result. A sister ruined, a family in turmoil. …She would not look at me. I was not surprised. I managed a few incoherent words, telling her I had nothing to plead in excuse of my stay but concern.

‘This unfortunate affair will, I fear, prevent my sister’s having the pleasure of seeing you at Pemberley today?’

As soon as I spoken, I thought how ridiculous the words were. Of course it would prevent it. She did not seem to mind, however, for she answered me directly.

‘Oh, yes. Be so kind as to apologize for us to Miss Darcy. Conceal the unhappy truth as long as it is possible.

I know it cannot be long.’

‘You can rely on my secrecy. I am sorry it had come to this – I wish you a happier conclusion to events than now seems possible.’

Because if a happy conclusion is possible, I will contrive it somehow, I thought.

With that I left her to her solitude and returned to Pemberley.

‘You have been abroad early,’ said Caroline as I entered the saloon. ‘You have been visiting Miss Eliza Bennet, perhaps?’

I saw the jealousy in her eyes, and heard it in her voice. I had never realized until that moment how deeply she wanted me. Or perhaps it would be fairer to say, how deeply she wanted Pemberley. Without it, she would have regarded me as nothing. My handwriting could have been the most even in the world and she would not have thought fit to comment on it.

‘Yes, I have,’ I returned.

‘And how is she this morning?’

‘She is very well.’

‘And we will be seeing her later, I suppose? How these country people bore one with their visits.’

‘No, she will not be calling.’

‘Not bad news from home, I hope?’ asked Caroline.

‘Lydia Bennet has not run off with one of the officers?’

I started, but then controlled myself. She could not have heard about it. Elizabeth had told no one but myself. Caroline’s words were the result of spite, and their accuracy was nothing more than luck.

‘Or perhaps her accomplished sister – Mary, is it not?

– visited Lydia in Brighton and attracted the attention of the Prince of Wales? Perhaps he has invited the whole family to stay with him, so that they can share in Mary’s triumph as she entertains him at the Marine Pavilion,’ she said in a droll voice.

‘Her uncle has had to take her home. He has been forced to curtail his holiday, as an urgent business matter has called him back to London.’

‘These city men and their urgent business,’ said Caroline, conveniently forgetting, as is her habit, that her father made his fortune from trade.

‘That is what comes of having an uncle in Cheapside,’ said Louisa. ‘I pity Miss Eliza Bennet. It must be mortifying to have to cut short a holiday on account of business.’

‘It reminds me that I, too, have business to attend to, which I have neglected for too long,’ I said shortly. ‘You will excuse me for a few days, I am sure.’

‘You are going to London?’ asked Bingley.

‘Yes.’

‘What a good idea. I should love a few days in London,’ said Caroline.

‘In all this heat?’ asked Louisa.

‘The heat is nothing,’ she said.

‘Can your business not wait?’ said Bingley to me. ‘I have to go to London myself at the end of the month.

We could go together.’

‘Unfortunately it is urgent. Stay and enjoy Pemberley.

There is plenty for you to do here, and my sister will make sure you are well looked after. I will not be away very long.’

‘I think I will take advantage of the opportunity to go to London with you and do some shopping,’ said Caroline, standing up. ‘I will call in on my dressmaker. You would not object to taking me with you in the carriage, I am sure.’

‘You will not wish to leave Georgiana,’ I said. ‘I know how much you enjoy her company.’

Caroline was silenced. She quite doted on Georgiana, or so she was fond of saying, and she could not pursue me without revealing her friendship to be false. She might betray Miss Bennet, but she would not care to betray Georgiana, particularly since I knew a plan fermented in her brain, similar to one I had once entertained, of Georgiana becoming her sister-in-law.