Must Love Hellhounds

Raphael sighed. “Not when they are reading the face of a woman they’ve obsessed over for the last six months. Tell me.”

I didn’t say anything. He would think less of me if I did.

“This is one of my hang-ups,” he said. “I’ll keep asking you what’s wrong until you tell me.”

Fair enough. “I’m a professional,” I said. “I went through the training, got knighted, the whole thing. I have decorations for meritorious service. But I have to rely on Kate to get the People to talk to me. It bothers me.”

He waited for more.

“Back in Texas, my partner and I took out a group of loups. My partner caught Lyc-V and went loup. I killed her. The Order tested me, but I got the all clear.”

“How did you manage that? The virus is in your blood.”

“I had a silver ring implanted under my skin in my arm just below the armpit. It pinched off my blood supply and then I shot liquid silver into my veins. It killed the virus. I cut my wrist to bleed out the dead virus cells, and the ring kept Lyc-V from the rest of my body from entering my arm.” The mere memory made me want to curl in pain.

“That was insanely dangerous. You could’ve lost your arm.”

“I almost did. But the blood work came back clear, and the amulet in my skull, the one you pulled out during the flare, kept my magic from leaking into an m-scan. I was given a clean slate, but they still shipped me off to Atlanta. Ted Monahan, the knight-protector, put me on the back burner. Before coming here, I was on the way to becoming Master-at-Arms, Firearm.”

Raphael nodded. “I take it that’s a big deal.”

“Very. I had all of my security briefings, passed all of the tests. All that remains is the formal nomination from my chapter’s knight-protector. But Ted will never do it.”

“Why not?”

“Because he senses there is something wrong with me. He isn’t sure what, and until he figures it out, I’m the only knight without any active cases. I don’t even have an office.”

Raphael’s jaw took on a stubborn set. I had seen it before a few times, and I knew what it meant. “I know that look.”

He turned a dazzling smile at me. “What look?”

“Promise me that you’ll cause no harm directly or indirectly to Ted by acting on my behalf. I’m dead serious, Raphael. Promise me.”

“What he’s doing to you-”

“Is exactly what I would do in his place. I knew the risks when I got into the Order. The Order has done absolutely nothing to renege on the terms of our bargain. All the fault lies with me. I deceived it, and if discovered, I’ll pay the price. I accept that.”

“What is the price?”

A spike of anxiety pinched me. My throat closed up for a moment. “They’ll throw me out on my ass.”

“Is that all?” he asked. “Are you sure they won’t send someone after you to make sure you don’t join the opposite side?”

“I’m sure,” I said. “Their conditioning is very good. It would take a lot to break my devotion to the Order even if they put me out on the street. Promise me.”

“Fine. I promise.”

We drove in silence for a few minutes.

Raphael’s eyes darkened. “Maybe we should be careful with public displays of affection.”

I gave him my thousand-yard stare. “Oh no. I think you misunderstand the nature of our relationship. You are mine. If there is an attractive female in speaking range, you will be publicly affectionate to me. Otherwise I’ll end up pistol-whipping them off you, and I’m pretty sure injuring innocent civilian hussies would be considered ‘conduct unbecoming a knight.’”

Raphael showed me the edge of his teeth in a slight smile. “And what will Ted think of you shacking up with a bouda?”

“Ted is welcome to show me a section in the Order’s regulations that forbids me to do so. My knowledge of regulations is extremely extensive. I can quote entire passages from memory. I guarantee that I know the rules much better than Ted.”

My brain took a second to process the words that had just left my mouth and realized how many things I had taken for granted. I said softly, “At least I hope you would be publicly affectionate.”

Raphael laughed softly, like a bemused wolf. “You ruined a spectacular alpha snarl.”

I had seen Raphael fight. He was devastatingly lethal. The way he tore up Cerberus’s head took both skill and the berserk frenzy that made boudas feared in any fight. Physically he could overpower me. I was barely five feet four; he was six feet and change. He outweighed me by about eighty pounds of hard muscle, toughened by constant exercise. He was without a doubt the best fighter of the bouda clan. But he was also a male, and bouda males preferred the beta role. I had snapped into an alpha mode without even realizing it.

“I didn’t mean…”

“I trust you to take the lead most of the time,” he said. “With the understanding that when I really insist, you will listen.”

I exhaled. “Agreed.”