On Blue's waters

That, as I realized sitting alone upon the quiet sea, had been the chief reason I had so readily accepted the task those five people had come to persuade me to undertake. How surprised they had been! They had brought food, tents, and trunks full of clothing, expecting to spend a week or more on Lizard; but in my books Silk was an account that had never been closed, one so large that it dwarfed all others. At fifteen, I had thought him the greatest of great men. At thirty-five, only a little taller, thick-bodied and nearly bald, I thought him a great man still.

I closed the book, and secured it in the cubby under the foredeck.

He would meet us at the lander, he had said, if he could; he had not met us there. Latecomers such as Blazingstar had reported that he was still caldé when they had left Viron; but even their information was years out of date. There had been Trivigaunti troopers in the tunnels, and it seemed probable to me then (I mean then, on the sloop) that they had captured him when he had tried to rejoin us. If so, it seemed likely that Generalissimo Siyuf would soon have restored him as caldé, subject to her orders. That would account for the latecomer’s reports, and in that case he might be governing Viron still, with every decision he made dictated by some cruel and arrogant Trivigaunti general.

Yet there were half a dozen other possibilities. No more settlers had reached us from Old Viron for years now, and Silk might have died aboard a lander that had failed to reach either whorl; everyone knew that not all the landers that left the Whorl landed safely on Blue or Green.

Equally, he might have been killed on Siyuf’s orders at a later date, or been deposed by her or some other Trivigaunti; in which case he might be living in exile.

With or without Hyacinth, he might have boarded a lander that took him to Green, and if he had he was presumably dead. Equally, he might have landed on some part of Blue remote from us. (This still seems possible to me, as I wrote when I began this straggling history.) Before they left Lizard, I had brought up the possibility with Marrow and the rest, and they had agreed that it could not be discounted entirely. Here I am in a part of Blue a very considerable distance from New Viron, and hear nothing of Silk; but that means nothing. If he were a hundred leagues east of Gaon and me-or on Shadelow-it would explain everything.

I may find him yet. Perseverance and prayer! All is not lost until I give up the search.

Very busy the last few days, busy until I was at length forced to put off all the others who desired to speak with me or desired to do it again, telling them that I required rest and prayer (which was true enough) and that my subordinates would hear their protestations, weigh their proofs, and decide matters. And telling my subordinates in turn that I trusted their judgment (which is not entirely false) and would support their decisions as long as they played no favorites and took no bribes.

Having said all that, and made it clear that I meant it, I retreated to this pleasant room and shut and barred the door. Here I sit, surrounded by a reverent hush, having prayed and read this rambling account of the beginning of my adventures through, and prayed again. All with intervals of pacing up and down, slamming my fist into my palm, and providing food and fresh water against the return of the pet who is no longer on his perch.

I am stunned to find this account as worthless as it is. It tells me nothing about myself (or Nettle, or the boys, or even Patera Silk) that I did not know already. It contains no plans for returning home, the very thing I should be thinking about most intently. Yet under these circumstances what plans can there be?

I must free myself from these handsome, generous, feckless people upon some pretense, and somehow procure a swift horse. Conceivably some other beast, although I would think a horse would be best. I must escape with cards enough-or the new rectangles of gold we use for cards sometimes here-to enable me to buy a small but seaworthy vessel when I reach the coast. After that, it will be in the hands of the Outsider and the weather gods of Blue-of the monstrous goddess whom Seawrack called the Mother, perhaps.

There is my plan, then. Under these circumstances, how can I plan anything more? The terrible aspect is that these people need someone like me very badly, and I am in a sense responsible for my own abduction.

As well as for them. They have made me their ruler, in name and very nearly in fact, and I have accepted the office. I, who have only a single wife for whom I long, now have no less than fifteen more-all young enough to be my daughters. Fifteen graceful and charming girls whom I sometimes permit as a very special favor to sing and play for me while I sit dreaming of home.