Sudden Independents

She walked quickly, surrounded by nightfall and blinded by the red haze of her anger. Her thoughts turned violent, churning, building pressure that required release. She fought the urge to smash something. If she stopped walking it would signal a change of action and then something awful would happen; she just knew it.

Before she realized where her feet carried her, she arrived at Jimmy’s. She visited his house often late at night, fantasizing about knocking on his window and climbing into his arms, but she always chickened out.

Tonight she planned to go all the way after dinner. She had prepared herself to be brave, to walk out with him and finally tell him how she truly felt. Vanessa had ruined that chance.

The last thing Molly wanted was for Jimmy to come home and find her slinking around his yard like some crazy girl. Molly wasn’t crazy. She was alone, and now thanks to Vanessa, her solitude would last an eternity.

Molly balled her hands into fists so tight that her fingers hurt. She definitely didn’t want to smash anything at Jimmy’s. She turned downhill, heading further from town where she could detonate in peace.

She couldn’t stop thinking about Jimmy after passing his house. They were perfect for each other, so why was she petrified to tell him? For one thing, she was terrible at handling rejection. She knew she was the most attractive girl in town, by far. She always caught boys following her with their eyes and big appreciative smiles when she wore something tight. Molly usually received several scribbled love letters a month from the ones who bumbled into adolescence.

Jimmy treated her kindly as a friend, but never seemed interested in her like the other boys, and that only stoked Molly’s desire. He was the one for her. He was handsome and mature, all the things a girl could ever want. He was tall and his brown hair framed a gorgeous, intense face. Sometimes she would sneak to the edge of town just to stare at him working in the fields. His shirt stretching against his muscular chest made her dizzy.

He needed her even if he didn’t realize it yet. Like Mark, though, Jimmy relied on Vanessa way too much. Damn her! She cast some sort of magical spell over both of them, bending them to her will and numbing them to Molly’s. Molly hated Vanessa so much; she sometimes found herself plotting Vanessa’s demise. Poison was usually her personal favorite, but right then, Molly wouldn’t mind using a big, heavy shovel upside the head. Then she could dig a hole to hide the body.

Molly’s angry stride came to an unexpected halt with two big sunken steps. She found herself ankle deep in a muddy field surrounded by cabbages.

“Damn it all to hell!”

She was stuck. She tried to free her feet one at a time, gripping with both hands around each knee and pulling, but she became more entrenched the harder she struggled. Meanwhile, she continued to sink and was now up to her shins.

“Let go of me, you stupid mud!”

She ripped one foot out of the earth and then the other, but the muck claimed her shoes. She considered surrendering them to their misfortune and scurrying back to her apartment with whatever dignity she could salvage, but she loved those shoes. Before the plague, Nebraska was a land populated by big footed Neanderthals because it was hard for Hunter to find shoes in her size. She couldn’t afford to lose a pair that fit.

Standing on solid ground, she bent over, knifed both hands into the mud and located one immediately. She pulled and strained and the shoe finally popped loose with a loud sucking slurp. She tossed it to safety. By now the hole had closed over her other shoe. She dug down, felt a mud-caked lace and followed it to the tongue. Her other hand met with the heel and she tugged. Nothing happened at first. She wrenched angrily, struggling harder, and felt a little give as the mud oozed away from the force she applied. Her fingers slipped, forcing her to regroup. She grunted with tremendous effort and the shoe broke the surface, flying out of her hands.

Molly lost her balance and twisted, landing on her back with a splat. She screamed and thrashed in frustration and pain until she was drained of rage and covered in mud. Tears arrived at last, washing away the final traces of anger and replacing it with a grief she never thought possible. She lay there for a long time wrapped in the cool mud and sorrow.

Eventually, she rolled out and wiped off as much mud as she could in the stiff grass that bordered the cabbage patch. She never felt more alone in all her sixteen years.

A tall shadow loomed over her, blocking the light from the stars. For a second, Molly thought she was dreaming. Her love, her savior had come to her rescue.

“Molly, are you all right?” Jimmy asked.

She choked and sobbed. He must have been looking for her.

Jimmy held out his hand and she slipped hers into it. His grip was firm and she experienced a warm thrill at his touch. Jimmy lifted her up beside him.

A smile curled the edges of his mouth. “What happened?”