Thank You, Jeeves

no ear for music," I said moodily. Then I stifled regret and tried to think not of my bereavement but of Chuffy's bit of luck. " Well, this is fine," I said heartily. " I hope you will be very, very happy. I can honestly say that I always look on Pauline as one of the nicest girls I was ever engaged to." " I wish you would stop harping on that engagement." ^ " Quite." i^" "I'm trying to forget that you ever were W. engaged to her." f " Quite, quite." " When I think that you were once in a >!' position to . . ." ||« " But I wasn't.

Never lose sight of the fact ^ that the betrothal only lasted two days, during H both of which I was in bed with a nasty cold." 1|?

" But when she accepted you, you must have . . ." " No, I didn't. A waiter came into the room < .with a tray of beef sandwiches and the moment , passed." " Then you never , . . ? " " Absolutely never." j "

She must have had a great time, being " engaged to you. One round of excitement. I i Wonder what on earth made her accept you ? " This had puzzled me too, more than a little. .X can only suppose that there is something in me ^f? ^P»t strikes a chord in the bosoms of these forceful females. I've known it happen before, on the occasion when I got engaged to Honoria Glossop. " I once consulted a knowledgeable pal," I said, " and his theory was that the sight of me hanging about like a loony sheep awoke the maternal instinct in Woman. There may be something in this." " Possibly," agreed Chuffy. " Well, I'll be getting along. I suppose Stoker will want to talk to me about the house. You coming ? " "

No, thanks. The fact of the matter is, old man, I'm not so dashed keen on mingling with your little troupe. I could stand your Aunt Myrtle. I could even stand little Seabury. But add Stoker and Glossop, and the going becomes too sticky for Bertram. I shall take a stroll about the estate." This demesne or seat of Chuffy's was a topping place for a stroll, and I should have thought he would have had a certain regret at the thought that it was passing out of his hands, to become a private loony-bin. But I suppose when you've been cooped up in a house for years with an Aunt Myrtle and a cousin Seabury for next-door neighbours, you lose your taste for it. I spent an agreeable two hours messing about, and it was well along into the late afternoon when the imperative need for a cup of tea sent me sauntering round to the back premises, where I anticipated finding Jeeves. A scullerymaid of sorts directed me to his quarters, and I sat down in the comfortable certainty that ere long the steaming pot and buttered toast would be to the fore. The happy ending of which Chuffy had recently Apprised me had induced contentment, and a hot cup and slab of toast would, I felt, just top the thing off. "

In fact, Jeeves," I said, " even muffins would scarcely be out of place on an occasion like this. I find it very gratifying to reflect that Chuffy's storm-tossed soul has at last come safely into harbour. You heard about Stoker promising to buy the house ? " " Yes, sir." " And the engagement ? " " Yes, sir." " I suppose old Chuffy is feeling great." "

Not altogether, sir." " Eh ? " " No, sir. I regret to say that there has been something in the nature of a hitch." " What! They can't have quarrelled already ? " • " No, sir. His lordship's relations with Miss Stoker continue uniformly cordial. It is with Ml. Stoker that he is on distant terms." " Oh, my God I " " Yes, sir." " What happened ? " " The origin of the trouble was a physical H&efttest between Master Dwight Stoker and

Master Seabury, sir. You may recollect my mentioning that during luncheon there appeared to be a lack of perfect sympathy between the young gentlemen." " But you said--" " Yes, sir. Matters were smoothed over at the time, but they came to a head again some forty minutes after the conclusion of the meal. The young gentlemen had gone off together to the small morning-room, and there, it appears, Master Seabury endeavoured to exact from Master Dwight the sum of one shilling and sixpence for what he termed protection." " Oh, golly I " " Yes, sir.

Master Dwight, I gathered, declinedin a somewhat high-spirited manner to kick in, as I believe the expression is, and one word led to another, with the result that at about three-thirty sounds indicative of a brawl were heard proceeding from the morning-room, and the senior members of the party, repairing thither, discovered the young gentlemen on the floor, surrounded by the debris of a china cabinet which they had overturned in their struggle. At the moment of their arrival, Master Dwight appeared to be having somewhat the better of the exchanges, for he was seated on Master Seabury's chest, bumping his head on the carpet." It will give you some idea of the grave concern which this narrative was occasioning