Thank You, Jeeves

The first nausea had worn off somewhat by this time, and it was a kindlier Bertram Wooster who now displayed himself. I am a broadminded man, and I reflected charitably that it was wrong to be hard on a fellow in Chuffy's situation. After all, in the special circumstanceshe could scarcely be expected to preserve the decencies. I struck a conciliatory note. " Chuffy, old man," I said, " we must not allow ourselves to brawl. This is a moment for the genial eye and the affable smile. No one could be more delighted than myself that you and this old friend of mine have buried the dead past and started all square again together. I may look on myself as an old friend, may I not ? " She beamed in a cordial manner. " Well, I should hope so, you poor ditherer, Why, I knew you before I ever met Marmaduke." I turned to Chuffy. " This Marmaduke business. I want to take that up with you some time. Fancy you keeping that dark all these years." " There's nothing wrong in being christened Marmaduke, is there ? " said Chuffy, a little heatedly. *

Nothing wrong, no. But we shall all have a good laugh about it at the Drones."

" Bertie,'' said Chuffy tensely, " if you breathe a word of it to those blighters at the Drones, I'll track you to the ends of the earth and strangle you with my bare hands." " Well, well, we must see, we must see. But, as I was saying, I am delighted that this reconciliation has taken place. Being, as I am, one of Pauline's closest friends. We had some pretty good times together in the old days, didn't we ? " " You bet." " That day at Piping Rock." " Ah." " And do you remember the night the car broke down and we were stranded for hours somewhere in the wilds of Westchester County in the rain ? " " I should say so." " Your feet got wet, and I very wisely took your stockings off." " Here I " said Chuffy. " Oh, it's all right, old man. I conducted myself throughout with the nicest propriety. All I am trying to establish is that I am an old friend of Pauline's and am consequently entitled to rejoice at the present situation. There are few more charming girls than this P.

Stoker, and you are lucky to have won her, old man, in spite of the fact that she is handicapped by possessing a father who bears a striking resemblance to something out of the Book of Revelations."

" Father's a good enough egg if you rub him the right way." " You hear that, Chuffy? In rubbing this bally old thug, be sure to do it the right way." " He is not a bally old thug." " Pardon me. I appeal to Chuffy." Chuffy scratched his chin. Somewhat embarrassed. " I must say, angel, he does strike me at times as a bit above the odds." " Exactly,"

I said. " And never forget that he is resolved that Pauline shall marry me." " What I " " Didn't you know that ? Oh, yes." Pauline was wearing a sort of Joan of Arc look. " I'm darned if I'll marry you, Bertie." *'

The right spirit," I said approvingly. " But can you preserve that intrepid attitude when you see Pop breathing flame through his nostrils and chewing broken bottles in the foreground ? Will you not, if I may coin a phrase, be afraid of the big bad wolf ? " She wavered a bit. "

We're going to have a tough time with him, of course. I can see that.

He's pretty sore with you, angel, you know." Chuffy puffed out his chest. " I'll attend to him I " "No," I said firmly, " I will attend to him. Leave the whole conduct of the affair to me."

Pauline laughed. I didn't like it. It seemed to me to have a derogatory ring. " You I Why, you poor lamb, you would run a mile if Father so much as said ' Boo I' to you." I raised the eyebrows. " I anticipate no such contingency. Why should he say ' Boo I ' to me ? I mean, a damn silly thing for anybody to say to anyone. And even if he did make that idiotic observation, the effects would not be such as you have outlined. That I was once a little on the nervous side in your parent's presence, I admit. But no longer. Not any more. The scales have fallen from my eyes.

Recently I have seen him in the space of something under three minutes reduced by Jeeves from a howling blizzard to a gentle breeze, and his spell is broken. When he comes, you may leave him to me with every confidence. I shall not be rough with him, but I shall be very firm."

Chuffy looked a bit thoughtful. " Is he coming ? " Outside in the garden, footsteps had become audible. Also heavy breathing. I jerked a thumb at the window. " This, if I mistake not, Watson," I said, " is our client now."

CHAPTER XX JEEVES HAS NEWS