The Big Bad Wolf

Part Three

WOLF TRACKS

I DIDN'T GET BACK to Washington until almost ten the following night, and I knew I was in trouble with Jannie, probably with everybody in the house except Little Alex and the cat. I'd promised we would go to the pool at the Y, and now it was too late to go anywhere except to sleep. Nana was sitting over a cup of tea in the kitchen when I came in. She didn't even look up. I bypassed a lecture and headed upstairs in the hopes that Jannie might still be awake. She was. My best little girl was sitting on her bed surrounded by several magazines, including American Girl. Her old favorite bear, Theo, was propped in her lap. Jannie had gone to sleep with Theo since she was less than a year old and her mother was still alive. In one corner of the room Rosie the cat was curled up on a pile of Jannie's laundry. One of Nana's jobs for her and Damon was that they start doing their own laundry. I had a thought about Maria then. My wife was kind and courageous, a special woman who'd been shot in a mysterious drive-by incident in Southeast that I'd never been able to solve. I had never closed the file. Maybe something would turn up. It's been known to happen. I still missed her almost every day. Sometimes I even said a little prayer. I hope you forgive me, Maria. I'm doing the best I can. It just doesn't seem good enough sometimes; good enough to me, anyway. We love you dearly. Jannie must have sensed I was there, watching her, talking to her mother. "I thought it was you," she said. "Why is that?" I asked. She shrugged. "I just did. My sixth sense is working pretty good lately." "Were you waiting up for me?" I asked as I slipped into her room. It had been our one guest bedroom, but last year we had converted it to Jannie's. I had built the shelving for the clay menagerie from her "Sojourner Truth period": a stegosaurus, a whale, a black squirrel, a panhandler, a witch tied to a stake, as well as her favorite books. "I wasn't waiting up, no. I didn't expect you home at all." I sat down on the edge of the bed. Framed over it was a copy of a Magritte painting of a pipe with the caption: this is not a pipe. "You're going to torture me some, huh?" I said. "Of course. Goes without saying. I looked forward to some pool time all day." "Fair enough." I put my hand on top of hers. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, Jannie." "I know. You don't have to say that, actually. You don't have to be sorry. Really you don't. I understand what you do is important. I get it. Even Damon does." I squeezed my girl's hands in mine. She was so much like Maria. "Thank you, sweetie. I needed that tonight." "I know," she whispered. "I could tell."