The Constant Gardener

BBB (Eber): We have a set procedure here for customer complaints regarding our pharmaceutical list, you see, Rob. We're only the distributor here. We import, we distribute. Provided the Kenyan government has green-lighted a drug and the medical centers are comfortable with using it, we are just acting as the intermediary, you see. That's pretty much where our responsibility ends. We take advice about storage, naturally, and make sure we are providing the right temperatures and humidity and so forth. But basically the buck stops with the manufacturer and the Kenyan government.

Officer: What about clinical trials? Aren't you supposed to be conducting trials?

BBB (Crick): No trials. I'm afraid you haven't done your homework on that one, Rob. Not if you're talking your structured, fully fledged type, double blind, put it that way.

Officer: So what are we talking?

BBB (Crick): Not once a drug is out there in a given country like Kenya, being distributed, that wouldn't be policy. A drug, once you're distributing it in a country and you've got the local health boys behind you a hundred percent, is what I call a done thing.

Officer: So what trials, tests, experiments are you conducting, if any?

BBB (Crick): Look. Don't do the words with me, all right? If you're talking about adding to a drug's track record, a real good drug like this one, if you're gearing up for distribution in another very major country — right outside the African market — the U.S. of A. for instance — yes, all right, I grant you, in an indirect way we can call what we are doing here trials. In that sense only. The preparatory sense, for the situation ahead of us, which is the day when ThreeBees and KVH jointly enter the new exciting market I'm alluding to. With me?

Officer: Not yet. I'm waiting for the word "guinea pig."

BBB (Crick): All I'm saying is, that in the very best way for all parties, every patient is in some degree a test case for the benefit of the greater good. Nobody's talking guinea pigs. Back off.

Officer: The greater good being the American market, you mean?

BBB (Crick): For fuck's sake. All I'm saying is, every result, every time we record a thing, a patient is recorded, those results are carefully stored and monitored at all times in Seattle and Vancouver and Basel for future reference. For the future validation of the product when we're looking to register it elsewhere. So that we're totally fail-safe at all times. Plus we've got the Kenyan health boys behind us at all times.

Officer: Doing what? Mopping up the bodies?

P. R. Oakey, QC: You didn't say that, Rob, I'm sure, and we didn't hear it. Doug has been extremely forthright and generous with his information. Perhaps too generous. Yes, Lesley?

Officer: So what do you do with complaints meanwhile? Bin them?

BBB (Crick): Mainly, Les, what we do, we shoot them straight back at the manufacturer, Messrs. Karel Vita Hudson. Then we either reply to the complaining party under KVH's guidance, or KVH may prefer to reply direct. Horses for courses. But that's the shape and size of it, Rob. Anything else we can do for you? Maybe we should pencil in another meeting for when you've got your documentation to hand?

Officer: Just a minute, d'you mind? According to our information Tessa Quayle and Dr. Arnold Bluhm came here in person last November at your invitation — ThreeBees' invitation- to discuss the effects, positive or negative, of your product Dypraxa. They also presented members of your staff with copies of the case notes they had sent to Sir Kenneth Curtiss personally. Are you saying you have no record of that meeting, not even who attended it from ThreeBees?

BBB (Crick): Got a date for it, Rob?

Officer: We have a diary entry confirming that a meeting was set at ThreeBees' suggestion for 11 A.m. on November 18. The appointment was made through the office of Ms. Rampuri, your marketing manager, who we now hear is not available.

BBB (Crick): News to me, I must say. How about you, Viv?

BBB (Eber): Me too, Doug.

BBB (Crick): Listen, why don't I look in Yvonne's diary for you?

Officer: Good idea. We'll help you.

BBB (Crick): Hang on, hang on. I'll have to get her OK on it first, obviously. Yvonne's a lot of girl. I wouldn't be going through her diary without her say-so, any more than I would yours, Lesley.

Officer: Ring her up. We'll pay.

BBB (Crick): No way, Rob.

Officer: Why not?

BBB (Crick): You see, Rob, Yvonne and her boyfriend have gone to this megawedding in Mombasa. When we said "attending to family affairs," that was the affair, right? A pretty bloody red-hot one, believe you me. So I would guess Monday would be the absolute earliest we could contact her. I don't know whether you've ever been to a wedding in Mombasa but believe you me —

Officer: Let's not worry about the diary. What about the notes they left with her?

BBB (Crick): You mean these so-called case histories you're talking about?

Officer: Among other things.