The Curse of Chalion

"Since the day in the menagerie that Fonsa's crow practically jumped up and down on your head crying This one! This one! My chosen god is, dare I say it, fiendishly ambiguous at times, but that was a little hard to miss."

"Was I glowing, then?"

"No."

"When did I start, um, doing that?"

"Sometime between the last time I saw you, which was late yesterday afternoon when you came back to the Zangre limping as though you'd been thrown from a horse, and today at the temple. I believe you may have a better guess than I do as to the exact time. Will you not take a little food, my lord? You don't look well."

Cazaril had eaten nothing since Betriz had brought him the milk sops at noon. Umegat waited until his guest's mouth was full of cheese and chewy crust before remarking, "One of my varied tasks as a young divine, before I came to Cardegoss, was as an assistant Inquirer for the Temple investigating alleged charges of death magic." Cazaril choked; Umegat went on serenely, "Or death miracle, to put it with more theological accuracy. We uncovered quite a number of ingenious fakes—usually poison, though the, ah, dimmer murderers sometimes tried cruder methods. I had to explain to them that the Bastard does not ever execute unrepentant sinners with a dirk, nor a large hammer. The true miracles were much more rare than their notoriety would suggest. But I never encountered an authentic case where the victim was an innocent. To put it more finely still, what the Bastard granted was miracles of justice." His voice had grown crisper, more decisive, the servility evaporating out of it along with most of his soft Roknari accent.

"Ah," Cazaril mumbled, and took another gulp of wine. This is the most wit-full man I have met in Cardegoss, and I've spent the last three months looking past him because he wears a servant's garb. Granted, Umegat apparently did not wish to draw attention to himself. "That tabard is as good as a cloak of invisibility, you know."

Umegat smiled, and took a sip of his wine. "Yes."

"So... are you an Inquirer now?" Was it all over? Would he be charged, convicted, executed for his murderous, if vain, attempt on Dondo?

"No. Not anymore."

"What are you, then?"

To Cazaril's bewilderment, Umegat's eyes crinkled with laughter. "I'm a saint."

Cazaril stared at him for a long, long moment, then drained his cup. Amiably, Umegat refilled it. Cazaril was certain of very little tonight, but somehow, he didn't think Umegat was mad. Or lying.

"A saint. Of the Bastard."

Umegat nodded.

"That's... an unusual line of work, for a Roknari. How did it come about?" This was inane, but with two cups of wine on an empty stomach, he was growing light-headed.

Umegat's smile grew sadly introspective. "For you—the truth. I suppose the names no longer matter. This was a lifetime ago. When I was a young lord in the Archipelago, I fell in love."

"Young lords and young louts do that everywhere."

"My lover was about thirty then. A man of keen mind and kind heart."

"Oh. Not in the Archipelago, you don't."

"Indeed. I had no interest in religion whatsoever. For obvious reasons, he was a secret Quintarian. We made plans to flee together. I reached the ship to Brajar. He did not. I spent the voyage seasick and desperate, learning—I thought—to pray. Hoping he'd made it to another vessel, and we'd meet in the port city we'd chosen for our destination. It was over a year before I found out how he'd met his end, from a Roknari merchant trading there whom we had once both known."

Cazaril took a drink. "The usual?"

"Oh, yes. Genitals, thumbs—that he might not sign the fifth god—" Umegat touched forehead, navel, groin, and heart, folding his thumb beneath his palm in the Quadrene fashion, denying the fifth finger that was the Bastard's—"they saved his tongue for last, that he might betray others. He never did. He died a martyr, hanged."

Cazaril touched forehead, lip, navel, groin, and heart, fingers spread wide. "I'm sorry."

Umegat nodded. "I thought about it for a time. At least, those times when I wasn't drunk or vomiting or being stupid, eh? Youth, eh. It didn't come easily. Finally, one day, I walked to the temple and turned myself in." He took a breath. "And the Bastard's Order took me in. Gave a home to the homeless, friends to the friendless, honor to the despised. And they gave me work. I was... charmed."