The Love Child

“And I’m glad you’ll be here for the ball,” I said.

“Gaiety in Venice, eh? As for you, I’m not sure you should go. You’re not really old enough for balls.”

It was the old theme with him. He regarded me as the perpetual child. I wondered what he would say if he knew the truth, and although I hated having to be secretive with him, I was glad in a way that he did not know.

It was the night of the ball. How romantic it was sailing down the canal to the Palazzo Faliero in our flowing gowns and our masks. The great hall of the palazzo was lighted with flaring torches. Its marble walls-mauves, greens and gold-gave it the appearance of a fairy palace. The water below the palazzo was crowded with boats and the Sound of music was in the air.

It seemed as though everyone in Venice was going to the masked ball.

There was no formal reception by the Duchessa because everyone was supposed to be unrecognizable behind their masks, which added to the excitement. At the hour of midnight all would assemble and unmask.

Gregory said that he thought there would be several uninvited guests.

Leigh’s comment was: “You must keep with me, Priscilla. I really think you are too young for such affairs.”

“Nonsense,” retorted Harriet. “One is never too young for such affairs. Priscilla passed out of babyhood some time ago.”

“Leigh will be calling me his little sister when I am fifty,” I said.

His voice was close to my ear. “I intend to call you something else then.”

We alighted and mingled with the guests.

There was an intoxication about the soft lighting and the music. From the veranda on the palazzo the torches shone out on the water and I felt I had come a long way from Eversleigh.

Leigh was close to my side. We danced together … not very well. Neither of us was exactly skilled and there were too many people to make it easy for the most practised performers.

Leigh said: “I don’t know why people come to these affairs, except of course to meet strangers.”

“Perhaps that is what you should be doing,” I suggested.

“I’m going to look after you.”

“Really, there’s no need to make such a task of it.”

“My dear child, do you think I would leave you alone … here!”

“I could look after myself.”

“There are some shady characters around, I do assure you. Adventurers, robbers, seducers … And don’t think you can look after yourself. You’ve shown…”p>

I said quickly: “You mean Jocelyn.”

“Well,” he said gently, “you are so young.”

I wanted to shout at him: Stop harping on my youth. I am not young anymore. I shall soon be a mother. That would startle him.

I felt impatient with him. I don’t know what it was about Leigh but I was always happy in his company. I wanted him so much to think highly of me. I had laughed and felt really happy when I was dancing with him; and I was gratified-while at the same time impatient-that he should insist on taking care of me. But I was irritated by his constant references to my youth, and I wanted to jerk him out of his belief that I was still a child.

In a room leading from the hall, tables had been set up and loaded with delicious meats, wines and fruit to which the guests were invited to help themselves when they felt in need of refreshment. Leigh and I took ours out to the veranda and found chairs there. We sat watching the lights on the water and the gondolas going back and forth, and at the same time listening to the clamour which came from the hall.

“It’s a little more peaceful here,” said Leigh. “I am sorry I shall have to leave you the day after tomorrow.”

“How is Edwin? Is he happy?”

“Do you mean that affair with Christabel?”

“Poor Christabel!”

“It would have been quite unsuitable.”

“Why should it have been?”

“She is not the one for Edwin.”

“You mean not rich enough? Not of the right background?”

“I meant nothing of the sort. She is a strange girl. She broods so much. I don’t understand her. Edwin needs someone lively. He is rather quiet. He needs someone who is entirely different from himself.”

“Did he really love Christabel?”

“He liked her very well. I think he was sorry for her. Edwin would always be moved by pity.”

“You think it was pity then?”

“It could have been.”

“He didn’t help her much, did he? It’s no use feeling pity for someone for a while and making it worse than it was before.”

“He was persuaded that it was not right to continue with it and I think he realized that.”

“She was very unhappy, you know.”

“She will recover. It’s better for her to be unhappy for a few months than for the rest of her life.”

“I wish he had not taken so much notice of her in the first place.”

“We all wish we had not done certain things at some time in our lives, my dear Priscilla.”

“Even you?” I asked.

“Even I.”

After a while we went back to the ballroom, Leigh keeping close to me all the time.