The Soldier's Rebel Lover

She got to her feet, but before she could move towards the door of the hut, Finlay caught her. ‘How can you be so daft?’ he said, pulling her into his arms, tilting her face up to force her to look at him. ‘You’ve not been wielding a gun, but you’ve been fighting for your country all the same. You’ve put everyone but yourself first, Isabella. Selfish—that’s the very last thing I’d call you.’

‘Daft, that is what you called me. You mean stupid.’

‘No. It can mean stupid right enough, but these auld Scots words, they’ve a wheen of other meanings.’

He was pleased to see that her tears had dried, her lips forming a shaky smile. ‘Such as?’

‘Such as brave, and bold. Such as beautiful and bright. Such as surprising.’

‘Because I admit I was wrong?’

‘Because you question yourself.’ Reluctantly, he let her go. She was too distracting, and what was more she deserved an honest answer to her original question—or as honest as he could muster. He sat down on the mud-packed floor once more. ‘You asked me how I choose between duty and human life, and I don’t really know how to answer that. I’ve fought on battlefields where people make their homes. I’ve staged sieges in towns where women and children and old men and old women are living. I’d like to think that it’s been worthwhile. Whenever my men have crossed the line in the aftermath of a battle—and there have been times—I’ve made sure they faced the consequences.’ The memories of some of those times made him wince. Finlay rubbed his eyes. ‘I’ve gone against some orders where my conscience has pricked me, but I’ve acted on others where I’ve been faced with the consequences only afterwards.’ More images, worse ones, flickered through his mind. He shook his head in an effort to disperse them. ‘I’m a soldier. I am trained to obey orders. I’m not supposed to question them. I’m supposed to trust that my superiors will act honourably, in the name of our country, but war...it isn’t like that, not all the time. Sometimes the lines are blurred and I—I have not always questioned as perhaps I ought.’

He had not noticed her sitting down beside him until she took his hand in hers. ‘But you did question the orders you were given when you came here,’ she said gently. ‘When I told you who I was, you could have acted then, but instead of taking me by force you waited, tried to persuade me to leave voluntarily.’

‘Not very successfully.’ Her fingers were long and slender, so small compared to his.

‘On the contrary,’ Isabella said. ‘You have saved my life.’

Gazing at her liquid amber eyes, holding her delicate hand between his, Finlay had the strangest feeling. Heartache? ‘Not yet, I haven’t. We’re not out of the woods yet,’ he said, as much to himself as Isabella.

‘What is more, you are committing treason to protect me,’ she said. ‘Your orders from the great duke were to silence me.’

‘Aye, well, that was one of those orders I’d never find it in my conscience to obey, but it’s not treason, Isabella, not really. As far as the duke is concerned, El Fantasma will be silenced, just not in the way he’s expecting.’

‘But surely lying to the Duke of Wellington is as good as committing treason? Finlay Urquhart, I do believe you are a hero. Foolish, reckless, but a hero nonetheless.’

‘Stop it, or you’ll have me blushing like a wee lassie.’

Isabella’s mouth curved into a smile. She closed the gap between them, reaching up to touch his cheek. ‘You’re no lassie. You’re a man, a beautiful man.’

‘Well, there, you see, you’re wrong. Nobody could describe me as beautiful.’

‘Oh, but you are.’ She ran her fingers through his hair. ‘The first time ever I met you, I thought, there is a man who will attract a second and a third glance.’

Her smile did terrible, wonderful things to him. It stirred his blood, that smile. It made him want to devour her. For she was a feast. A banquet.

Her mouth was only a few inches from his. Her fingers were feathering the skin at the nape of his neck. ‘You can’t call a rough, burly Highlander beautiful,’ Finlay said in a vain attempt to change the subject.

‘I just did,’ Isabella said with a mischievous smile. ‘And I’m not referring to your appearance. You are a beautiful man, Finlay Urquhart, because you have saved my life. You have risked your life—are risking your life for me. I am completely in your debt, as are my family, though they do not know it. You will always have a special place in my heart because of that, regardless of what the future holds.’

‘Then, that is all the reward I need,’ Finlay said, surprising himself by the depth of emotion in his voice. Forcing himself to get to his feet, he stamped out the fire and began to pack up. ‘As to the future, that can keep for later. We’ve a few more miles to put between us and Hermoso Romero first.’

Chapter Ten