Titans of Chaos

The windows here are nothing like the windows I knew in Wales, broad sheets of shining glass,taller than a man and as wide as an embrace, admitting torrents of southern sun when shut, andthe warmest zephyrs when opened wide. The western wall of the room here was more glass thanstone, and a second sun shone in the reflections of the pale white floor.

It is worth every penny to stay in a place like this, even if you are counting near to your lastpenny. Warm days drift by while you walk warm sands, wearing as near to nothing as the lawallows, and your limbs turn golden-brown; even being alone is not so much a hardship as it mightseem, if you are paid up in your hotel suite through the end of the month, and you are young,healthy, blond, beautiful, and wearing a bikini.

One difficult side effect of being alone, healthy, blond, and young I had not entirely foreseen wasthe men: Men who want to buy you drinks, buy you food, take you to do their odd style of hoppingrock-and-roll dances, and even ask you to shows. It is profoundly amazing how many men, ofwhat age and range of types, will pursue you: men Who certainly have granddaughters older thanyou will smile avuncular smiles while their eyes devour you with un-grandfatherly hunger; boystoo young to be out by themselves will strut and posture for you, saying the stupidest thingsimaginable; crazed men with staring eyes, quiet men with eyeglasses; cheerful or morose men;bald or vain or desperate; men you would never tell the time of day to.

It is amazing how well the worst ones think of themselves, and how little the best ones do.

Some are so bold, it defies belief. More than one man at a cafe table, during the moment when hisdate stepped away, would send a drink to my table, and catch my eye, and smile. The most boldwas this tall and dark-haired chap with arrogant eyes, who asked me for my phone number whilea pouting brunette in a tank top was clinging to his arm, listening. What do such men think Iwould think of them? That I am eager to be courted by cads? It was at times like these I wishedthat Victor were near, or even Colin.