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Fluffikins’s claws retreated back into his paw, and he set his foot on the tile floor. “Did I say anything about drinking blood?” he asked with a low growl. He then turned to me with a peeved-off look. “You humans and your stupid lore. You’ve set vampires back hundreds of years, thanks to your so-called entertainment. Hundreds of years, that’s when they actually did drink blood. It’s been ages!”

“I’m s-s-sorry,” I muttered, more a question than a declaration. Why was he blaming me for this when I was the only one here who was actually trying to help him!

“Normally new vampires aren’t left on their own. Something must have gone wrong with your turning.” The black cat blinked slowly while watching the newly revealed vampire for his reaction.

“So I wasn’t born a vampire?” Drake’s voice still squeaked like a preteen as he pushed out words in a hurry. “My mom and dad aren’t—“

“Heavens no, nobody is born a vampire. How ridiculous!” Now it was Mr. Fluffikins who was rolling his eyes. Cats were not the most patient creatures, something I’d learned early on in my employ as a familiar.

But Drake didn’t know any better. Even if he’d been okay with my magical stuff, this was different. He’d just found out that he was a monster, and one who had been unintentionally causing havoc at that.

He sank to the floor, cradling his head in his hands.“I’m dead,” he murmured. “I’m legit dead.”

“Well, technically you’re undead,” Fluffikins clarified with a sniff.

“Just like those squirrels,” Merlin added with a laugh.

Luna shot him an irritated glance.“Go gentle on him, dear. Can’t you see how upset he is already?”

Fluffikins had started laughing, too, but managed to pull himself together quickly.“If you’re friends with this guy, how did you not figure out what he was?” he asked me.

“That’s a good question,” I said, turning my eyes back to Merlin.

He puffed up defensively.“What? I can’t know everything about everything, okay? I knew something was up with the guy, but most vampires are loud and proud. How was I supposed to know what he was when even he didn’t?”

Well, he had a point there.

“Settle down, you.” Luna brushed up against Merlin’s side and purred, nuzzling him until he at last deflated.

“You three will be able to see yourselves home from here, right?” the boss cat asked Merlin, then walked up to a gently sobbing Drake. “You need to come with me.”

He continued to cry, not acknowledging Fluffikins or any of the rest of us. As for me, I didn’t know exactly what Mr. Fluffikins did on a day to day, but I knew he wasn’t used to taking no for an answer. And I also knew he would be unlikely to back down now.

Sure enough, the black cat extended his claws and tapped at Drake’s arm. “Did you hear me, vampire? I need you to—“

“Perhaps we could be a little more delicate with him?” I suggested. “And maybe since you’re here, you can help us with our zombie problem? I mean you did offer earlier. Let’s take a break from vampires and talk zombies. Sound good?”

He shook his head from side to side.“That was before I’d found my charge. As you can see, I got what I came for and now I need to get back to Beech Grove. Many pressing matters await the vampire and me there.”

“Are you kidding me right now?” Luna piped up. It wasn’t like her to go on the offensive like this, but apparently she’d been pushed too far. “You’re the diplomat for this entire region, and you’re not at all worried about a zombie invasion?”

“It was very clear they were coming for you and you alone, so it’s not an issue that takes precedence. This guy on the other hand…” He jerked his head toward Drake. “He’s been causing trouble all across Peach Plains. We need to rein him in, and ASAP, or risk the exposure of our kind.”

“So what? You’re just going to let us die at the hands of this rogue zombie master?” I exploded, glaring at the cat with all the hostility I could muster.

“Tell you what,” Fluffikins said with a sigh. “Submit your request in writing, and the board will get back to you in 5-10 business days.”

I nodded dumbly. It was the only way to keep from screaming at the helpless jerk.

Fluffikins tapped Drake with his claws again and cleared his throat.“Now are you coming with me or what?”

Drake sobbed and moaned but didn’t offer any words in response.

“Fine, then. We’ll do it the hard way,” Mr. Fluffikins bit out, and then both he and Drake disappeared in a swirl of sparkling pink magic.

10

The three of us that weren’t swept up by Mr. Fluffikins’s flash magic marched out of the house and into Drake’s backyard. Once there, Merlin blinked twice to take us home. It was always easier for him to navigate outdoors rather than from inside an unfamiliar place.

“Well, a fat load of good that did us,” the Maine Coon grumbled before padding over to his water dish for a quick drink.

“It was a good plan, dear. Really,” Luna coaxed. “But Drake rescued us before our zombie master could capture us.”

“I’m very angry with you,” Merlin said to his wife after licking a few errant drops of water from his lips.