Witch from the Sea

“Somewhere in my heart, Tamsyn, I always knew that he was the one for me. Always, when I was far away from him, I remembered that he was there in my life. And now he is there no more.”

I tried to comfort her. I told her I felt that my mother was not really gone. “I seem to feel her there close to me,” I said. “When I am unhappy or frightened I call to her. Then I’m not afraid any more.”

“May God bless you, little granddaughter,” she said.

Fenn Landor came to be with us on the day of the burial. He had grown up and was different from the boy I had met before. He would soon be sixteen—and so should I. We were no longer children.

My grandfather was buried in the Pennlyon burial grounds. They were not as large as ours at Paling, for the Pennlyons had only been in the house for a few generations.

Connell, Senara, Fenn and I used to go out riding together and Fenn and I always seemed to find ourselves together. He liked that because he wanted to talk to me about the Trading Company of which he was now a member. He was going to take his father’s place, he said. He still talked a great deal about his father.

“One of these days,” he said, “I shall find out what happened to him.”

I remembered his grandmother who thought he was at the bottom of the sea. We could talk together about our parents, both being in the same position, and we were very happy together.

Senara grumbled. “You and Fenn Landor are always going off together.”

“Why should we not?”

“I think he’s a bore.”

“You may think what you please. That does not affect my opinion.”

She stamped her foot. “If I were a witch,” she said, “I’d put a spell on him.”

“Don’t dare say such things, Senara,” I retorted angrily.

She looked a little frightened.

“I would though,” she went on. Then she was soft and clinging. I never knew anyone to change moods more quickly than Senara. “Don’t like him better than you like me, will you, Tamsyn?”

“As if I could.”

But she set me wondering.

I did like Fenn. I liked him very much indeed and I hated saying goodbye to him when it was time to return to Castle Paling.

“We shall meet again soon,” he said. “I will call at the castle and you must come and visit us.”

When we went home Fenn rode with us. It was on the way to his home of Trystan Priory, he said.

My grandmother was a little dubious when she heard that he proposed accompanying us; then she lifted her shoulders. “Why not?” she said. “He will protect you from the dangers of the road.”

Later when we were alone, just before I left, she said: “The two families have never met since the death of your father’s first wife. It used to be rather awkward when your mother was alive. We saw so much of the Landors, being involved in business together, and Fenn’s grandmother could not be induced to see anyone connected with your father.”

“Why ever not?”

“Your father’s first wife was her daughter.”

“Her daughter. The one she said was …”

She stopped me before I could finish. “She was hysterical with grief. She refused to see things as they really were. She wanted to blame someone for her daughter’s death so she blamed the daughter’s husband. What happened was that your father’s first wife died in childbed.”

“And she blamed my father for that?”

“She was of the opinion that her daughter was too frail to bear children and should never have been allowed to try to do so.”

“That seems unreasonable of her.”

“People are not always reasonable in their grief.”

“And for that reason she would not meet my father!”

“That’s true, Tamsyn.”

“She made a strange remark about my mother. Do you remember when I went into her room on that night and found her crying?”

“I remember it well. It was just after the disappearance of young Fenn’s father. Poor soul! I think the loss of her children unhinged her mind.”

“But what she said about my mother …”

“I cannot bear to think of it, Tamsyn. My daughter … she was so young. And to die in her bed.”

“Her heart failed, they said.”

“And she had been unwell and had not told me. The greatest regret of my life is that I was not there to nurse her.”

“She did not appear to need nursing. I was with her on the nights preceding that one. But on her last night I was not there.”

My grandmother covered my hand with hers.

“My dearest, we must try not to grieve. So Fenn is going to ride back with you. He will stay a night or two at the castle, I dare say, for I am sure your father will not object. You like Fenn, do you not?”

“Oh, I do. He is so interesting and so … good.”

She smiled. “At one time I thought his father might have married your mother. The son is so like the father that sometimes I could believe it is Fennimore who is here and the girl who likes him so much my own Linnet.”

“Did you want her to marry that Fennimore?” I asked.

She turned her head away and did not answer. Then she said suddenly: “She wanted your father. In the end it was her choice.”

I did not quite know what she meant by that but I believed the subject was painful to her and I did not want to make her more unhappy than she already was.