Английский разговорный шутя. 100 самых смешных анекдотов на лучшие разговорные темы

1. Она едет домой, чтобы приготовить своему мужу обед.

2. Ей невероятно везет, когда она обращает внимание на время.

3. Она бросается вон из дома своей подруги.

4. Она осознает, что у нее очень мало времени.

5. Все, что у нее есть в буфете, это завядший / вялый лист салата, яйцо и банка кошачьего корма.

6. С ужасом она наблюдает, как ее муж садится за обед / обедать.

7. Нет нужды говорить, что с этого дня каждый четверг она готовила этот обед.

8. Мы говорили тебе, что кормление его этим кошачьим кормом убьет его.

Revise English Grammar

В предложении She was very pleased at being praised… используется герундиальный оборот, в который включена пассивная форма герундия;

в предложении We told you that feeding him that cat food every week… стоит активная форма герундия.

Проверьте, насколько хорошо вы владеете навыками использования этих форм; при необходимости обратитесь к грамматическому комментарию (раздел 27).

6. Fill in the blanks with either an active or a passive form of the Gerund:

1. Her husband insisted on (to give) _______ good healthy food for his dinner.

2. She couldn't help (to stay) _______ in the club until the game was over.

3. He was looking forward (to serve) _______ that cat food for his dinner.

4. She didn't object at all to his (to climb) _______ the mantel whenever he wanted.

5. He did not mind (to feed) _______ cat food at all .

6. She enjoyed (to play) _______ bridge with the ladies.

7.Transform Indirect Speech into Direct Speech by making necessary changes:

1. She told her cronies that she had to go home and fix her husband his dinner.

2. He asked her if she had had an incredible hand in bridge.

3. She said that her husband was going to be angry if it was not ready on time.

4. He said that that was the best dinner she had ever made for him in forty years of marriage.

5. He asked her to make that for him any old day.

6. They said that the woman was going to kill her husband.

7. The ladies said that she had really killed him with the cat food.

8. She asked her cronies not to blame her for it.

8. Find English equivalents to the Russian words in the scanword:

1. (1… ) салат, 2. (g… ) украшать, 3. (m… ) убийство, 4. (с… ) советовать, консультировать, 5. (w… ) недостатки, недочеты, 6. (s… ) чесать, 7. (е… ) обмениваться, 8. (d… ) требовать, 9. (m… ) любовница, 10. (j… ) драгоценности.

9. Render the joke.

Section 25 Football wedding

Two guys are talking about their boss's upcoming wedding.

One says, «It's ridiculous, he's rich, but he's 93 years old, and she's just 26! What kind of a wedding is that?»

The other says, «Well, we have a name for it in my family.»

«What do you call it?»

«We call it a football wedding.»

The first asks, «What's a football wedding?»

The other says, «She's waiting for him to kick off!»

Study the words and expressions given below:

upcoming приближающийся

ridiculous нелепый

to kick offфутб. делать первый удар в начале игры; зд. сленг умереть, сыграть в ящик

Exercises to the text

1. Answer the questions to the text:

1. What were the guys talking about?

2. Why did they think the upcoming wedding ridiculous?

3. What name for a wedding of this sort do they have in the family?

4. Was the boss a good football player?

2. Fill in the blanks with the words from the text:

1. Two guys are talking about their boss's _______.

2. It's _______, he's 93 years old.

3. What _______ of a wedding is that?

4. What do you _______ it?

5. The girl's waiting for him to _______!

3. Match the two parts of the sentences:

4. Match the words and expressions in the left column to those in the right one:

5. Translate from Russian into English:

1. Ей только 26 лет!

2. У нас в семье есть название для этого.

3. Мы называем это футбольной свадьбой.

Revise English Grammar

Один из участников разговора обозначен в тексте как The other… Проверьте свои навыки использования прилагательного other и производных от него слов another, the other, others. При необходимости обратитесь к грамматическому справочнику (раздел 28).

6.Fill in the blanks with missing words; follow the directions given in brackets:

1. He has divorced recently, and he just wants to get himself (другую) _______ wife.

2. All (другие) _______ wives that he has had were also much younger than he was.