Аполлион

Deacon’s eyes widened dramatically. “They’d want me for my glorious blond locks.”

“It’s about time someone cut your hair.” Aiden mussed the already unruly curls and then threw the covers back. “I’m taking a shower.”

The look Aiden sent me said he hadn’t planned on doing it alone, and my stomach did all kinds of crazy twists and turns. It didn’t help that he strode across the room in all his bare-chested glory. The heat that zinged through my veins was hard to deny, but Deacon apparently wasn’t going anywhere.

I waited until Aiden closed the door and I heard the hiss of the shower before I glanced down at his younger brother. “What?”

His lips tipped up on one side. “We need to chat.”

Having no clue what was going to come out of his mouth, but positive it would be entertaining, I wiggled down and stretched out beside him. “Okay. About what?”

“You need to stay alive.”

Okay, so not what I was expecting. “I’m not planning to off myself, Deacon.”

“No, but you have that look of someone who is facing down death, practically even expects it.” Deacon paused and his gaze went to the bare rafters in the ceiling. “I know what that looks like. I saw it in the mirror for a long time.”

My mouth opened, but I couldn’t find any words.

He laughed dryly. “I hated living after seeing what’d happened to my parents and those other people. If it hadn’t been for Aiden, I wouldn’t have survived. I shouldn’t have survived. Neither should he.” He gave a lopsided shrug. “I guess I had a mad case of survivor’s guilt or something lame like that. Every time I drank or got high, I secretly hoped that I would overdo it, you know?”

As his words sank in, my chest ached. I reached over, placing my hand on his arm. “Deacon…”

“Ah, I’m okay now. I think I am, at least. But you know why I never really went there?” Deacon turned his head toward me and I knew what he meant. “I wasn’t scared of death, but I was scared of what me dying would do to him.”

Deacon nodded at the bathroom door and my gaze followed his. I couldn’t see Aiden and I knew he couldn’t hear us, but my heart was pounding like I’d just run up a thousand steps.

“He wouldn’t get past losing you,” I said, swallowing hard. “He’s so strong, but…”

“It would kill him. I know. Losing you would kill him.”

A cold chill washed over me, like I’d stepped into a freezer. Sitting up swiftly, I tugged my hair over one shoulder. “Why are you telling me this?”

“You’ve had that same look ever since you came back from the Underworld.” There was a pause, and he looked at me with all the seriousness no one ever gave him credit for, and in that moment he reminded me so much of Aiden. “Whatever you do, don’t break my brother’s heart. You are his world. And if you leave it, it will destroy him.”

CHAPTER 30

Our Hummer was the party car—the cool one. Or at least that’s what I believed. Between Luke and Deacon, the ten-hour drive to the wilds of South Dakota wasn’t turning out to be that bad. Poor Marcus looked like he wanted to duct tape the two boys’ mouths shut after two hours of their nonstop rundown of the last season of Supernatural. I wasn’t complaining. Then, Luke moved on to this new show about thrones and dragons, which he tried to explain to Aiden. Considering that Aiden was a fan of old black-and-white TV shows, Luke wasn’t getting very far.

Marcus looked like he had a headache, which mirrored how I felt. It had nothing to do with the boys’ chatter or the ridiculous—but hilarious—car games they insisted on playing. And I was pretty sure that, if Deacon leaned between the seats and punched Aiden on the arm one more time he saw a Beetle, Aiden was going to the pull the car over and strangle him.

I was also sure Marcus would hold Deacon down. The man had to have a wicked bruise on his leg from the last punch Deacon had delivered.

But after the fourth hour, restlessness set in. Minutes from turning into the kid the parent threatens to turn the car around on, I tried to get some rest. It wasn’t like the scenery was much to look at. Lots of fields. Then lots of hills. Then lots of trees. Boredom itched at my skin as I stared at the wards, drawn in Titan blood throughout the car, that kept the gods from sensing me. But the fact that I was stuck in the vehicle for the foreseeable future wasn’t the worst part. The steadily increasing throbbing in my temples sent a nervous rush through my system.

Seth was there, pecking away, waiting for that moment he could pop in and have a chat. Part of me almost welcomed it, because it would be something to do, but that was so stupid. Talking with Seth wouldn’t help anything. He was on one side of the fence and I was clear on the other side.

I didn’t want to think at all.

Twisting in the seat, my eyes met my uncle’s. I smiled as he nodded at Deacon. The pure had finally passed out, with his cheek plastered against the window. Beside him, Luke was staring out the window, jaw locked down tight.