Flirting with Fire: A Summer Camp Swingers novel

I closed the bedroom door behind us and cut off the sound from the living room.

“Okay, much better,” I said into the phone.

“So,” Christy asked in a lighthearted voice, “how was your day?”

“Busy,” I deadpanned.

“Doin’ what?”

“Oh, this and that.”

It was a game we played. Allie had heard it before, albeit from Christy’s side. She furrowed her brow but then figured it out.

“Get to the point,” Wren called in the background. “Did you fuck her yet?”

I sighed. Why did everything have to be so complicated? And why did it involve so many people, especially women?

Do you really wanna know? I mean, if you haven’t figured it out by now…

“Oh my gosh,” Christy laughed, “is he giving you a hard time too? Oh, you poor thing.”

And why did I marry a woman who could read my mind? I sighed. Again.

“If he’s talking to his dick,” Wren jeered in the background, “he must’ve struck out. You’re oh for two!”

“Wren, please be nice. Sorry about that,” Christy said to me. “You know how she is.”

“Mmm.”

“Is Allie there? Can I talk to her? Oh, wait! You should probably do it. You’re the man. Besides, it’s in the Handbook. Page six.” I knew that one by heart, but she quoted it anyway, “It’s the man’s job to seduce the woman’s friends, especially the ones she wants him to.”

“Oh, God,” Wren groaned, “not the Handbook again.”

I laughed. The Man Handbook was completely imaginary. Christy had made it up when we were first dating, and she’d filled it with rules to get what she wanted.

“Ignore her,” she said to me. “She’s just jealous that she doesn’t have a Handbook too.”

“I don’t need one!” Wren cried. “I know what I’m doing!”

“Yes, my love,” Christy said dismissively. “Now, do you want to find out what happened?” She waited, and I could imagine Wren rolling her eyes. Christy played at being submissive, but it was a velvet glove. She had a core of steel, and Wren knew it as well as I did.

“Sorry,” I said to Allie in an undertone. “Wren’s being a pest.”

“As usual,” Christy said. “Oh, you were talking to Allie. Tell her hi, by the way. And I’m glad she finally came to her senses. I’ve been telling her for months. Well, years, but you know what I mean.”

“I do.”

“Mmm, my favorite.”

“Oh, God, I’m gonna hurl,” Wren said in the background. She and Trip had switched roles at some point in the past twenty years. Now he was the grown-up, and she was the immature one. What the hell, hormones?

“Do you think the little market is still open downstairs?” Christy said to her. “I’d love some ice cream. Maybe a drumstick?”

Wren started to argue, so I covered the phone.

“Are you sure you wanna get involved with us?” I asked Allie.

“I think so. Why?”

“Because we’re insane. Like, certifiable.”

She grinned. “Is it contagious?”

“Yeah, a little bit. It’s transmitted through bodily fluids.”

“Oral?”

“Of course. Vaginal too—”

“I’m in!”

“—and anal.”

Her jaw fell.

“Oh, I know all about it,” I chuckled. “Christy tells me things too, remember?”

“Hello…? Paul…? Are you there?”

I removed my hand and raised the phone to my ear. “Sorry about that. I was talking to Allie.”

“No, I’m sorry,” Christy said. “Wren went to get snacks. It’s just us now. Well, us and Allie, but you know what I mean.”

“Mmm.”

“So… what were you telling her?”

“How I’m going to fuck her in all three holes.”

“Lucky her!” Christy laughed.

Allie herself gulped.

I cradled the phone against my shoulder, turned her around, and bent her over the dresser. She moaned softly when I lifted her shirt and bared her ass.

“We’ve been fooling around,” I said to Christy in the same conversational tone as before.

“You and Allie? While the girls were watching the movie?” Christy and I did the same thing sometimes.

“Mmm hmm.” I teased Allie’s pussy from behind. “She’s really wet.”

“Oh my gosh, I’m getting wet too,” Christy said. “Are you going to fuck her? Now? Can I listen?”

“Not yet. I might let her blow me, though.”

“Mmm, my favorite. Hers too. She likes when you shoot in her mouth and finish on her face. Rub it around and get her really messy. I told you, didn’t I?”

“I don’t think so, but—”

“Yeah, I did. That night. You know, after Leah’s party.”

“That really narrows it down,” I snarked.

I glanced at Allie in the mirror, but she wasn’t paying attention. Her eyes were closed, and she was breathing hard. The open neck of her shirt gave me a fantastic view of her deep cleavage.

“Fine, Mr. Smarty-pants,” Christy said. “It was the night we gave you a blowjob sandwich.”

“If you say so,” I agreed vaguely.

“You were kinda drunk at the time. So it’s been a while.”

Something sparked a memory. “Hold on… didn’t we make a video that night?”

“I… um… don’t think so.”

It was a lie, but she plowed ahead before I could call her on it. I glanced at Allie instead. Mr. Big was ready to fuck her, but the closest condoms were in the master bedroom. I reluctantly patted her ass and lowered her shirt.