Flirting with Fire: A Summer Camp Swingers novel

“You came on my face,” Christy was saying. “Leah licked it off, and we were kissing, remember? We passed it back and forth? That’s what made me think of Allie, ’cause we were so messy. Leah was humming— Oh, oh! I remember, now! ‘Happy Birthday,’ that’s it. And the cake! It had a thirty-five on it.”

I reeled from the conversational whiplash. Allie straightened and swayed for a different reason. I slid my arm around her waist, to steady her as much as myself. She rested her head on my shoulder and sighed heavily.

“God, I need a dick so bad.”

I nodded agreement and silently chuckled at my life. I had my chatterbox wife in one ear, her friend in the other, and they were both horny. Well, one of them was. The other had switched gears. Again.

“So… um… how long ago was that?” Christy asked.

Allie seemed content for the moment, so I turned my attention to the other ear.

“Well,” I hinted, “she’ll be thirty-eight in October.”

“Who, Leah?” Allie said. Then she laughed. “You know Christy can’t do math.”

“Paul, dear,” Christy herself agreed, “you know I can’t do math.”

“It was 2000,” I prompted.

“Hold on… how’d you get from thirty-eight to two thousand?”

“That was the year!”

“Oh, yeah, I knew that.” She paused and made another Christy-leap. “Tell her I’m sorry. Allie, I mean. For distracting you.”

“She’s fine,” I said.

“Well, I’m not. I’m really excited.” She switched back to logistics just as quickly as before. “I suppose she’s officially on the list now. Will you call me tomorrow and tell me how it went? I promise I’ll charge my phone and have it with me.”

“Sure. It’ll probably be late morning,” I said. “Maybe afternoon.”

Allie nuzzled my neck in anticipation. “I love dick in the afternoon.”

“Why? Oh, right!” Christy said. “Dance camp. I forgot. That’s okay, I’ll call Allie instead.”

“What?” I blurted. “Why?”

“Paul, dear, you never give enough details. Men in general…” She imitated Trip, “Yeah, I banged her. Best she’s ever had. Totally ruined for anyone else.”

I laughed, even though it was Trip from ten years ago. The new Trip was a pretty nice guy, and a lot less conceited. Still, she was right about the level of detail.

“Is everything all right?” Allie said, and I nodded quickly.

“Oh my gosh,” Christy said in my other ear, “I can’t believe it’s really happening! Do you think she’ll join us? For real, I mean, as a swinger.”

“Too soon to tell.”

Allie raised an eyebrow, but I gave her a quick headshake. Everything’s fine. I’ll tell you later.

“Well, I hope she does,” Christy said. “It’s your job to make her. Only, she doesn’t want to be forced. Not like me. Mmm, you’ll have to hold me down and fuck me— Oh my gosh, listen to me! I’m doing it again. Sorry. We were talking about Allie. Take care of her, Paul.”

“I’ll do my best.”

“I’m serious. She really needs this, way more than I do. I’ve told you what she was like. Before Ken, I mean. And I don’t think you understand what it was like for her. He basically neglected her. Like, for years.”

“Well, we’re about to change that,” I said.

“I hope so. I really want her to be happy.”

“Me too.” I slid my hand into Allie’s shirt and pinched her nipple. She gasped in surprise.

“I heard that,” Christy laughed. “Be careful. She doesn’t like it as much as I do. Maybe a little, but nothing really kinky. Oh, and you need to make sure she understands. Our relationship, I mean, yours and mine. I’ve told her, like, a million times, but I still don’t think she believes me.”

“I’ll make sure she does.”

“I know. And now I’d better let you go. Wren’ll be back soon, and I’ll have to tell her everything. Then she’ll want me to go down on her, and we’ll be up all night if she doesn’t take care of me too. Like, a couple of times.”

“Sounds familiar,” I chuckled.

“Mmm,” she agreed. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“And take care of Allie,” she added in a softer voice. “She really needs it. Tell her I love her. After you fuck her brains out. Remember, fucking first, cuddling after. Got it?”

“Got it,” I chuckled. “G’night, Sunshine.”

“Good night, Mr. Moon.”

I closed the phone, and Allie leaned back to look at me expectantly.

“Well, good news, bad news,” I said.

“I’m officially on the list?”

“Yep.”

“Then… what’s the bad news?”

“We have to wait till the girls are in bed. Unless you want a quickie now, hard and fast, bent over the dresser.”

“It’s tempting,” she laughed, “but I think I’ll hold out for a better offer!”

“Are you sure? I’m pretty good with a quickie.”

“So I’ve heard. But I want the full experience, the whole nine yards, so to speak.”

“I dunno about nine yards, but I can give you seven inches.”

“But… you promised me twenty-one.” She caressed my chest and grinned. “Or should I say twenty-two and a half?”

My eyebrows tried to fly into orbit.

“You forget,” she laughed, “I can do math.”

* * *

The girls didn’t even notice when we returned to the living room. Part of me was relieved, even though we hadn’t been doing anything naughty. A smaller part was annoyed, since we could’ve been doing something naughty!