Have His Carcase

‘Ah! But when a young lady asks for it — besides, I rather wanted to find out what the girl — the lady, that is, was after. When your mother’s pretty well off, don’t you see, you rather get the idea that people are looking out to make a bit out of her.’

Wimsey laughed.

‘So you thought you’d vamp Miss Vane and find out., How great minds do think alike! She had rather the same idea about you. Wondered why you were so damned anxious to push her and me out of the place. I’m not surprised you each found the other so easy to talk to. Miss Vane said she was afraid you had seen through our little plot and were pulling her leg. Well, well! So now we can come out into the open and be perfectly frank with one another. So much jollier and all that, what?’

Henry Weldon looked at Wimsey suspiciously. He had a dim notion that he had somehow been jockeyed into an absurd position. It was all very well — that damned girl and this chattering lunatic of an amateur detective seemed to be working hand in glove. But it did cross his mind that all this talk about frankness was a little one-sided.

‘Oh yes, rather!’ he replied, vaguely; adding rather anxiously: ‘No need to tell my mother all about this, eh? She wouldn’t like it.’

‘Possibly not,’ said Wimsey. But you see — the police, what? I don’t’ quite see — British justice — duties of a citizen and all that, don’t you know. I can’t prevent Miss Vane from going to Inspector Umpelty, can I? Free agent and so on — and she’s not over and above pleased with you, from what I can make out.’

‘Oh, I don’t mind the police.’ Henry’s face cleared. ‘I’ve nothing to hide from them, you know. Not a bit. Rather not. Look here, old man — if I tell you all about it, couldn’t you just tip them off and get ’em to leave me alone. You’re’ damned thick with that Inspector fellow if you tell him I’m all right he’ll take it from you.’

‘Oh, yes! Good fellow, the Inspector. Not his business to betray confidences. There’s no reason whatever, so far as I can see, that Mrs Weldon, should know anything about it. We men must stick together.’

‘That’s right!’ Undeterred by experience, Mr Weldon instantly entered into another alliance, offensive and defensive. ‘Well, look here. I came along to Darley on Tuesday evening and got permission to camp in Hinks’s Lane.’

‘You knew the place pretty well, I gather.’

‘Never been there in my life; why?’

‘Sorry — I thought you, meant you knew about Hinks’s Lane before you got there.’

‘Eh? Oh’ Oh, I see what you mean. I got it from some chap I met in a pub in Heathbury. Don’t know his name., ‘Oh, quite!’

‘I got in some stores and so on and settled in. Then, next day — that was Wednesday I thought I’d better make a start on my inquiries. Stop a bit. That wasn’t till the afternoon. I just loafed round in the morning — it was a grand day, and I was tired with trekking across country, especially as the car hadn’t been going any too well. After lunch I had a go at it. It took me a devil of a time to start the bus, but I got her to go at last, and ran over to Wilvercombe. I went first of all to the registrar’s and found that there was no marriage-notice put up there, so I followed that up by a round of the churches. There was nothing there either, but of course that proved nothing very much, because they might be going to get married in London or somewhere by licence or even by special licence.

‘The next thing I did was to get the address of this chap Alexis from the people at the Resplendent. I took good care to dodge the old lady. I rang up the management with a story about a parcel that had gone to the wrong address, and got it out of them. Then I went round to the address they gave me, and tried to pump the old woman there, but she wasn’t having any. However, she said I might find Alexis in a restaurant she told me about. I went round; he wasn’t there, but I got talking with a fellow who dropped in — some dago, I don’t know his name, and he said something which made me think I could find out what I wanted at the Winter Gardens.’

Henry paused.

‘Of course,’ he said, ‘this must look pretty fishy to you — me hanging round there asking, about Alexis, and then all, this business happening next day, but that was exactly what I did. Well, I went back to where I’d left the car, and had more trouble with it than ever I began to curse the fool who’d hired it out to me, and I thought I’d better take it to a garage. Well, naturally, having once been started and warmed up, it went all right, and the garage people couldn’t find anything wrong with it. They undid a few things and tightened a few things and charged me half a crown and that was all. By the time they’d finished, I was getting fed up, and thought I’d better take the beastly thing home while she was running. So I went back to Darley, with the engine missing all the way. After that, I went for a walk and that was the end of that day, except that I dropped in a bit later for a pint at the Feathers.’

‘Which way did you walk?’