Kinky Confessions

She snorted a laugh but allowed me to guide her head down. She relaxed as she sucked, although she still had her mind on her story. She stopped after a couple of minutes and returned to her still-warm spot by my side. I pulled the covers over us.

“Better?” I said.

“Much. Thank you. I always feel better with something in my mouth.

Usually it’s a pencil or my thumb or something, but a penis works too. Laugh all you like,” she said before I could, “but you benefit from it.”

“I do.”

“Not till the wedding. Now, where was I? Right, Brooke. Her family isn’t Catholic but her parents sent her to private schools, so that’s why she was going to Uni. She likes girls, duh, although she’s into guys too. And she’s the baby of the family, like me. Her sister’s a lot older, but she and her brother are five years apart.”

“Just like you and Laurence.”

“Mmm hmm. And she totally had a crush on Hunter, her brother.” Christy squeezed my dick. “You know where this is going.”

“I think so.”

“But you want me to say it.”

“Yep.”

“That’s okay. I knew you would. Why do you think I couldn’t sleep? Do I wanna tell you or not?”

“You know you do. You wouldn’t’ve brought it up if you didn’t.”

“I know, but I’m still scared. I’ve kept it hidden for so long.” She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Okay, I can do this. Like me and Laurence.” She let his name hang there for a moment before she worked up the courage to continue, “I had a crush on him. I wanted to… do things. You know… what I like.”

“Mmm hmm, I do. And that wasn’t so hard, was it?”

“Something else is hard, but telling you wasn’t. And it feels like a huge weight’s been lifted.”

“It has,” I chuckled. “Remember what you said about secrets? They aren’t so dark and dirty when they’re in the light.”

“I know, but I didn’t think it’d be like this.”

“Well, you know I’m not going to make you feel dirty. Besides, real incest is rare, but the fantasies are pretty common. Unless you and Laurence

—?”

“Oh my gosh, no! But… I really wanted to. Only, sometimes I’m glad nothing ever happened. I mean, I can’t help but think of Lani and Peter and feel sorry for them. They used to be so happy and normal. But they… I dunno how to describe it.”

“They couldn’t resist their urges. And they couldn’t handle the guilt afterward.”

“Urges,” Christy mused. “That’s a good word for it.”

“Yeah. We both know what it’s like.”

“You can say that again,” she said softly. Then, “It feels weird talking about this. Brooke and I did, sort of, but not really. She never knew how I felt.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure,” I said. “I mean, why did she tell you her fantasies?”

“Just… because,” Christy said obstinately.

“Did you get excited?”

“You know I did.”

“And maybe she noticed? Even if you didn’t say anything aloud?”

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Hmm.”

“She didn’t!” She fell silent and sulked.

“To thine own self be true,” I said after a moment.

“Now I wish you’d never said that.”

“Well, I did. Shakespeare said it first, but he isn’t here at the moment.”

“Thank goodness! I’m still scared that you know how I felt.”

I stroked her back and let her calm down.

“No, I take that back,” she said eventually. “I’m scared that you know how I feel.”

“Ah. Present tense.”

“I knew you’d get it. And I think you’re probably right—Brooke knew.”

Christy paused again to gather her thoughts. “She had a stash of her mother’s old Variations, and one issue had a whole section about family. Not family-family, but stepfathers and sisters-in-law and people like that. One letter was from a woman who did it with her stepbrother. They were going to a wedding and were supposed to have separate rooms. The hotel had a convention and a mix-up with the reservations, so they only had one room left.”

“Yeah, I can imagine.”

Christy sighed as she remembered. “Brooke gave me the magazine and told me to read that particular letter. She knew how excited I’d get. I guess it was sort of a test, ’cause then she told me about her and Hunter.”

“What happened between them? Anything serious? Or just the usual fantasies?”

“Nothing serious, but more than just fantasies. He lived at home for college, when her family was still in Texas. The bathroom connected their bedrooms, so she spied on him. He had a stash of magazines too— Playboy and regular Penthouse—and she watched as he looked at them and jerked off.

“Sometimes she did the same thing. Not with magazines, but she played with herself on her bed with the bathroom door ajar. I never did anything like that with Laurence,” Christy added, “but I… um… tried to see him whenever he was home from school. And we had to share a bathroom in Japan. I was too young to be interested in boys, but I saw him. Nude, I mean. And once…”

She thought about it for a long time before she cleared her throat and continued. “Once, he was home for Christmas. We’d been doing figure drawing in my art class at UCSD, so I asked him to pose for me.”

“Did he do it nude?”