Читаем Лучший Учебник Английского Языка полностью

Лучший Учебник Английского Языка

I am not an ordinary student. I am from a very rich family and live in a luxury village near Moscow. My father is a member of the Russian Parliament and a well-known businessman. He isn’t as rich as Mr. Usmanov or Mr. Abramovich but he is rich enough to have a 2000 square meters mansion, a business jet, five premium cars ( Mercedes, BMW, Porsche, Lamborghini and Jaguar), a mansion in Lugano in Switzerland and a mansion on Lake Como in Italy. Of course, he has enough money to have two 20 year old paramours who look like top models from a glossy magazine. My mother knows about their existence but keeps silence because she loves father’s money more than father…and doesn’t want any divorce. My dad is interested in politics, girls, history, art and in 100 different things but he really loves only money. He adores money. He is in politics because politics gives good opportunities to steal money from the national budget and to pass laws in the interests of a big business. I know that my father is totally corrupt but I love him because he gives me money for girls, night clubs and my posh Ferrari. I love him. Oh, yes, really! No doubt, guys! No doubt, girls!! No doubt, gays!!!

My mother is a former model. She has four children besides me. All of them are my younger brothers and sisters. She is interested in many things but in fact in nothing. She likes going to bed late and getting up as late as possible. She is good at nothing but in smiling, lying, throwing dust in other’s eyes and wasting my father’s money, of course. Inside our family she has a nickname « our Charming Spender». She looks very beautiful even at the age of forty. She spends a fortune on beauty products, beauty saloons, rejuvenating treatment and all this stuff. She likes traveling to Maldives, Seychelles, Mauritius, Bahamas and to French Polynesia. Yes, to other gorgeous places too.

I can’t tell much about my siblings because all of them are like each other. They like playing computer games, watching bullshit on YouTube and asking their tutors to do homework instead of them. I would like to be the only child in my family because I would be the only heir. Unfortunately, this dream is impossible to come true.

What am I like? What do I look like? What do I like? Questions without answers… Be or not to be… Life is tragic but sweet. I like everything sweet and tasty. Tasty food and sweet girls. I like everything to be beautiful. Beautiful cars, houses, clothes, people. Beauty in everywhere and in everything. I like looking cool and looking cooler than my friends. Am I clever? Yes, I am clever. Am I kind? Yes, I love my cats Fluffy and Puffy, especially my long legged pussycat Mary from the neighboring village. Luxury village, of course. So, what about my appearance? I am quite tall (180 cm), slim and sporty, with fair hair and blue eyes. I’m interested in everything that is strange, unique or unfathomable. I like listening to classical music and playing the violin. I like learning foreign languages thanks to my tutor George who teaches me English and German. I also enjoy mountain skiing in Switzerland or diving in the Caribbean. I am a fan of fantasy and science fiction books. I am a fan of my own unique personality!

For what do I live? For pleasure. What do I want? Happiness. What can I wish you, my readers? Wealth, of course. Why? Just because happiness is not in money but in its quantity. Wealth means money in good quantity, so when you are wealthy and smart enough to use it properly you can be happy.

Don’t worry! Be happy!

Notes:

1. Mercedes – Мерседес-Бенц

2. BMW – БМВ

3. Porsche – Порше

4. Lamborghini – Ламборгини

5. Jaguar – Ягуар

6. Lugano – Лугано, город в швейцарском италоговорящем кантоне Тичино.

7. Lake Como – Озеро Комо, одно из самых красивых мест в Италии.

8. The Maldives – Мальдивы, острова в Индийском океане.

9. The Saychelles – Сейшелы, острова в Индийском океане.

10. Mauritius – Маврикий, остров в 900 км. к востоку от Мадагаскара.