Midsummer's Eve

"But still there'll be the baby.”

I couldn't stop thinking of the baby. I saw it ... fair-haired, rather like Aunt Amaryllis, with a sweet flower-like face. For a few moments I forgot Helena's dilemma contemplating it.

"I haven't known what to do. Sometimes I've thought it would all be settled if I jumped over the side of the ship.”

"What an awful thing to say! Put that right out of your mind. This is going to give us problems but we're all here to help-my parents, Jacco, me-all of us. It'll all come right. It really will and there'll be the dear little baby.”

"I can't think of it like that. There's too much to be faced. I never thought this would happen. I thought we were going to be happy together.”

"You should perhaps let John know.”

"I couldn't do that.”

"Then you could be married.”

"No, no." She sounded hysterical so I said quietly: "No, I suppose not. Do you mind if I tell my mother?”

"I don't want anyone to know.”

"But they will know in time and they'll help. I know they will.”

"I feel so much better now you know.”

"Poor Helena. What you must have gone through ... and all Because of what happened ...”

I thought, If it hadn't been for that chairmanship they would have gone on as planned and nobody would have known.

"Helena," I said, "you have been very sick. Ever since you came on board.”

"Yes, I think that's what it was. I feel awful sometimes in the mornings.”

"You should have told me right away.”

"I couldn't. But you know now.”

"Helena, I want to tell my mother in the morning. She will know what is best to be done. Do let me tell her.”

After some hesitation she said: "All right. And you'll help me, won't you, Annora?”

"We all will. I'll do anything in the world, I promise.”

"I'm so glad to be with you.”

"I'm glad we're here. It will be all right, Helena, I know it will.”

"I feel it might be, now that you know," she said. "It's like a great weight being lifted from my mind.”

I felt immensely gratified, and a great tenderness swept over me and with it a desire to protect Helena.

I took the first opportunity of talking to my mother. I told her that I had something very important to say and that I wanted to talk to her alone.

We found a spot on deck. The sea had turned choppy and we were alone there. We sat down on a bench and I burst out: "Helena is going to have a baby.”

I had rarely seen her so startled.

"A baby! "she echoed.

"Yes. She thought she and John were going to be married, you see.”

"Oh yes. I see.”

"What shall we do?”

My mother was silent for a while. Then she said: "Poor girl. No wonder she's been looking as though she would like to jump overboard.”

"She did actually mention that.”

"For Heaven's sake, watch her. She could be hysterical. Then goodness knows what would happen.”

"I want to reassure her. I've told her we'll look after her.”

My mother nodded. "It's a good thing we are going to Australia. That'll help a lot. No one will know her there and we'll manage it.

When?”

"She thinks April.

"I see. Well, that gives us time.”

"But what are we going to do?”

"There is nothing we can do here ... only reassure her. We've got to make her see that it is not such an unusual situation and she is by no means the first girl to whom it has happened.... Then we'll decide what we're going to do when we get to Sydney. She should take care of herself now. I'm glad she is in with you. Just reassure her. Don't let her get overwhelmed by a sense of guilt. I'll speak to your father. He'll know what to do when we get there. We'll arrange it all. As I say, it is a good thing we are not at home. That could have been decidedly more difficult.

I daresay they have mid wives and doctors in Sydney. Lots of children must be getting born out there. We'll see to it all. Don't let her worry. That's the great thing.”

"I think she is glad not to be at home.”

"Amaryllis would have helped all she could.”

"She wouldn't want her father to know.”

"He's in no position to condemn anyone," said my mother shortly.

"I shall tell her you know and that you have said you will help. What will happen when we take the baby home with us?”

"We'll deal with that when the time comes. Let's get her out of that suicidal mood and make her see that what has happened to her is not all that unusual and above all that she is with her family and we are going to help.”

"Oh thank you. I knew you'd make it seem better.”

She smiled at me and pressed my hand; and we went on talking about it for a long time. My father came and found us.

"I wondered where you were," he said. "What is this? The women getting together for a little peace and quiet?”

My mother looked at me and said: "I've just heard a startling piece of news.”

"Oh?" He looked from her to me and she went on: 'Helena is going to have a baby.”

"Good God!" he cried. Then: "John Milward?”

I nodded.

"He'll have to marry her.”

"She won't hear of his being told.”

"Though," went on my father, "how we'd get him out here I can't imagine.”

"This must be treated with the utmost tact, Jake.”

"Is that an indication that I should keep out of it?”