My Secret Life

“I'll piss now if I am not too stiff, and will give you five shillings if you'll all feel my prick after,” — for I was now wildly lewed and began emptying my bladder. — They looked on. “I will,” said the first one who'd pissed — “but give it us first.” — I gave it, she and the tall one felt it, then the other did, then both felt it again. “Well if ever I had such a lark in my life — well,” said one. — “Oho — hoh,” — for it got stiff in her handling. — “He — he — he,” all laughed together now. “Good night I hope you'll all be well fucked to-night.” — “He — he — he — he — he,” — I heard dying away in the distance as they went off.

Before I got to the corner going slowly in the opposite direction, I saw far off a man and a woman cross the road to the dark side where carts were standing. Slackening my pace for a few seconds, when opposite to the spot I saw they were fucking hard. They took no notice of me as I stood watching. Then I went off to the main thoroughfare and waited, guessing that one would return that way. Soon a gentlemanly dressed man came round the corner very hurriedly, and was out of sight in a minute. Back I turned and met the woman, evidently a demirep. — “Do you want me my dear?” — “I'd like to feel your cunt, it's just been fucked, and I'll give a shilling.” — “All right — oh, wait, here comes a policeman.” — We talked till he'd passed, and then among the carts I felt her for a shilling. — I've felt scores at that price, but had just paid five shillings a feel.

Afterwards going along * * * * St. filled with desire, burning with lust, thinking of what a lot I had done in twenty minutes — I saw a nice looking girl and went home with and fucked her.

[There are now double the number of lamps in the street where this piddling took place, empty carts no longer stand there, fucking and piddling is no longer so easy to accomplish without hindrance. I went recently to see, for I like revisiting the scenes of my amours.]

[This is not the only time I've felt in the streets the cunts of women not harlots. On similar occasions — tho not in that street — twice I'm sure I've felt two women when together. — In one case one of the women was much younger than the other, in both cases they were respectable, and I think married women of the humbler class. One consented first and then induced the other. Women can be made lewed by suggestion. That the money, drink, and opportunity, did it in all cases, all were a little lewed. I think the narrative of these incidents has been retained but am not sure.]

Then occurred (and soon after the Franco-German war) one of the most singular of my experiences. I was at a great German city stopping there for the night only, took a walk in the evening and thought I should like to see the bagnios there, never having yet done so. Not being able to ascertain their whereabouts, I hired a fiacre and told the coachman to drive me to the best one.

I saw five women, — there were ten in the house, and five were then ministering to male pleasures and their own profit. A tall, nut brown haired woman, with soft dark eyes and clear complexion, clad in a handsome, loose, yellow silk dress, attracted me, and soon I sat watching her take off her very nice linen. — Then she was lying on the bedside with chemise up to her breasts, and to my surprise and delight I found her secret charms were quite hairless. — For the moment I seemed under some delusion, but there was no mistake. Her motte had the slightest sprinkling of nearly invisible light brown down, which might have covered a shilling, but it did not hide her beautifully white flesh there, and as the down approached the sacred orifice for the male, it ceased altogether, and the split from one end to the other was absolutely hairless. The puffy surrounding off the indent — scarcely to be called lips — was soft, elastic, white, and smooth as ivory, with a delicate coral tinted line just peeping, which was hidden lower down by the closing of the plump white buttocks on either side.