Mything Persons

Guido supplied.

"I noticed it, too," I acknowledged, "but it isn't

nearly long enough. We'll just have to use up my power

getting up to the cell and figure some other way of

opening the window."

"Ummm... you don't have to do that. High

Roller," Massha said with a sigh. "I've got something

we can use."

"What's that?"

"The belt I'm wearing with all my gear hung on it.

It's a levitation belt. The controls aren't horribly reli-

able, but it should do to get us to the top of the tower."

I cocked an eyebrow at my apprentice.

"Wait a minute, Massha. Why didn't you mention

this when I asked?"

She looked away quickly.

"You didn't ask about a belt. Only about rope and

climbing hooks."

MYTH-ING PERSONS 93

"Since when do I have to ask you specific questions

... or any questions, for that matter, to get your in-

put?"

"All right," she sighed. "If you really want to know,

I was hoping we could find a way to do this without

using the belt."

"Why?"

"It embarrasses me."

"It what?"

"It embarrasses me. I look silly floating around in the

air. It's okay for skinny guys like you and Guido, but

when I try it, I look like a blimp. All I'd need is Good-

year tattooed on my side to make the picture complete."

I closed my eyes and tried to remember that I was

tired and that I shouldn't take it out on my friends. The

fact that Massha was worried about appearances while I

was trying to figure out a way to get us all out of this

alive wasn't really infuriating. It was... flattering!

That was it! She was so confident of my abilities to get

us through this crisis that she had time to think about

appearances! Of course, the possibility of betraying that

confidence set me off in another round of worrying.

Wonderful.

"You okay. Boss?"

"Hmmm? Yeah. Sure, Guido. Okay. Now Massha

floats up to the window, which leaves you and me free

to...."

"Hold it, Hot Stuff," Massha said, holding up a

hand. "I think I'd better explain a little more about this

belt. I bought it in an 'as-is' rummage sale, and the con-

trols are not all they should be."

"How so?"

"Well, the 'up' control works okay, but the 'altitude'

is shaky so you're never sure how much you can lift or

94

MYTH-ING PERSONS 95

Robert Asprin

how high it will go. The real problem, though, is the

'down' control. There's no tapering-off effect, so it's

either on or off."

I was never particularly good at technical jargon, but

flying was something I knew so I could almost follow

her.

"Let me see if I've got this right," I said. "When you

go up, you aren't sure how much power you'll have, and

when you land. ..."

"...it ain't gentle," she finished for me. "Basically,

you fall from whatever height you're at to the ground."

"I don't know much about this magic stuff," Guido

commented dryly, "but that doesn't sound so good.

Why would you use a rig like that, anyway?"

"I don't ... at least not for flying," Massha said.

"Remember, I told you I think it makes me look silly?

All I use it for is a utility belt... you know, like Bat-

man? I mean, it's kind of pretty, and it isn't easy to find

belts in my size."

"Whatever," I said, breaking into their fashion dis-

cussion. "We're going to use it tonight to get up to the

cell even if it means rigging some kind of ballast system.

Now all we need to figure out is how to open the cell

window and a getaway plan. Guido, it occurs to me that

we might pick up a few lessons on jailbreaks from your

experiences even if they were unsuccessful. I mean,

negative examples can be as instructive as positive ex-

amples. So tell me, in your opinion what went wrong in

the plans you followed in the past?"

The bodyguard's brow furrowed as it took on the

unaccustomed exercise of thought.

"I dunno, Boss. It seems that however much planning

was done, something always came up that we hadn't

figured on. If I had to hang our failures on any one

thing, I'd say it was just that... overplanning. I mean,

after weeks of lectures and practice sessions, you get a

little overconfident, so when something goes wrong

you're caught flatfooted, know what I mean?"

Nervous as we were, that got a laugh from both

Massha and me.

"Well, that's one problem we won't have to worry

about," I said. "Our planning time is always minimal,

and for this caper we're going to have to put it together

in a matter of hours."

"If you take hours, you'll never pull it off," Vilhelm

said, entering our planning room just in time to hear my

last comment.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Massha growled.

"Say, are you sure you guys are on the level?" the

vampire said, ignoring my apprentice. "It occurs to me

that I've only got your word on all this... that Vic is

still alive and all. If you're taking advantage of my good

nature to get me involved in something crooked...."

"He's alive," I assured him. "I've seen him myself

since we were here last... but you didn't answer the

question. What was that you were saying about what

would happen if we took hours to plan the jailbreak?"

The Dispatcher shrugged.

"I suppose you guys know what you're doing and I

should keep my mouth shut, but I was getting a little