Mything Persons

stead of flying free, this particular dimension is excep-

tionally low on force lines to tap in to. If anything, I

think I'm pretty lucky that I brought 'these two' along

instead of ending up with a whole team of for-real magi-

cians who are too proud to use gimmicks. It's thanks to

'these two' that I made it this far at all. Now, dtf you

want our help, or do you want to wait for the next team

to float past? I mean, you're in no rush, are you?"

"Now don't get your back up, partner," Aahz said

soothingly. "You caught me a little off-guard is all. So

tell me, just how do you figure to get me out of here?"

That brought me back to earth ... or as close to it as 1

could get while suspended in mid-air.

"Umm... actually, Aahz, I was kinda hoping you

might have a few ideas on the subject. You're usually

pretty good at coming up with plans to get us out of

tight spots."

"What I want to know," Guido snarled, turning

slightly in the wind, "is how come your partner hasn't

figured a way out of there all by himself, if he's so all-

fired smart?"

I started to rebuke my bodyguard, but slowly his

words sank in. That was a good question! Aahz was

strong ... I mean STRONG! By rights he should have

been able to rip the stone teeth out of the window all by

himself. What was keeping him here?

"Oh, I'm having so much fun in here I just couldn't

bear to leave," Aahz barked back. "I'm in here because

I can't get out, that's why. What's more, if any of you

have any ideas about how to get me out, I think now's a

real good time to share them with the rest of us."

"Wait a minute, Aahz," I said. "Why can't you get

out... and how did they catch you in the first place?"

"I was framed," my partner retorted, but I noticed

his voice was a bit more subdued.

"We already know that." Impressed. "What I want to

know is why you didn't just bust a few heads and sprint

for home? You've never been particularly respectful of

local authority before."

To my surprise, Aahz actually looked embarrassed.

"I was drugged," he said in a disgusted tone. "They

put something in my drink, and the next thing I knew I

had a stake and mallet in my hands and a room full of

officials. Whatever it was they used, it kept me groggy

all the way through the trial... I mean I couldn't walk

straight, much less defend myself coherently, and after

that I was in/we!"

"The old Mickey Finn trick!" Massha snorted, rock-

ing our entire formation. "I'm surprised someone as

off-worldly as you could get caught by such a corny

stunt."

"Yeah. It surprised me, too!" Aahz admitted. "I

mean, that gag is so old, who would really expect any-

one to try it at all?"

"Only if you figured the mark was louder than he was

smart," Guido sneered.

"Is that so!" my partner snapped, ready to renew

their old rivalry. "Well, when I get out of here, you and

me can...."

104 Robert Asprin

"Stop it, you two," I ordered. "Right now the

problem is to get us all out of here before the balloon

goes up ... no offense, Massha. Now spill, Aahz.

What's so special about this cell that's keeping you bot-

tled up?"

My partner heaved a great sigh.

"Take another look at it, Skeeve. A close look."

I did. It still looked the same to me: a tower room in

the shape of a dragon's head.

"Yeah. Okay. So?"

"So remember where we are. This thing was built to

hold vampire criminals. You know, beings with super-

human strength that can change into mist?"

My gaze flew back to the dragon's head.

"I don't get it," I admitted. "How can any stone cell

hold beings like that?"

"That's the point." Aahz winced. "A stone cell

can't\ This thing is made of living stone. If whoever's

inside tries to bust out, it swallows them. If they try to

turn into mist, it inhales them."

"You mean...."

"Now you're getting the picture."

He flashed his toothy grin at me despite his obvious

depression.

"The cell is alive!"

Startled by this revelation, I looked at the tower top

cell again. As if it had been waiting for the right cue, the

dragon's head opened its eyes and looked at me.

Chapter Twelve:

"For the right person, the impossible is

easy!"

—DUMBO

To everyone's surprise, particularly my own, I didn't

find the revelation about the true nature of Aahz's con-

finement at all discouraging. If anything, I was doubly

pleased. Not only did I have an immediate idea for how

to beat the problem, I had arrived at it before my

knowledgeable partner... well before, as a matter of

fact, as he had been pondering his dilemma for days

whereas I had only just received the information. Of

course, he was probably not in a position to see the easy

solution that I could.

"What are you grinning at?" he demanded. "If

there's anything funny about this, it eludes me com-

pletely."

Unlike my own amiable self, Aahz tends to show his

worry by getting mad. Come to think of it, he tends to

express almost any emotion by getting mad. Well, at

least he's consistent.

"Tell me," I said, eyeing the dragon's head, "you say

this thing's alive. How alive is it?"

105

106

Robert Asprin

MYTH-ING PERSONS

107

"What do you mean, 'how alive is it'?" Aahz