Side Effects May Vary

Eric ran to the front of the café to pick up our steaming mugs of cider. He sat down in the chair opposite me and placed our drinks down on the round, wobbly table between us. Whenever either of us accidentally hit the table leg with our knee the cider sloshed around and splattered onto the surface.

It was a freakishly chilly night for the month of April, especially considering my half-packed suitcase at home full of shorts, tank tops, and swimsuits. Natalie had decided, for the first time ever, to close the studio for spring break. Tomorrow was a half day at school, and my parents, Natalie, Harvey, and I would all be driving to the beach on Sunday morning. My mom’s boss had a house there on the water, and he was letting her use it for the week.

This all sounded great, perfect even. Except that Harvey and I hadn’t talked in over a month. My mom kept trying to pry me open and find out what was wrong, but when her attempts at cracking me had failed, she sent in backup—my dad, who had even worse luck.

I should have been relieved that Harvey had backed off. He’d started dating Dennis’s twin sister. I’d seen them together in the hallways and suspected something, but it was my parents who officially broke the news to me. We all sat at the kitchen table, eating dinner, when my dad asked if I’d hung out with Harvey and his new girlfriend.

I swallowed my food and bit down on my lip.

My mom looked at me questioningly. “Yeah,” she said. “Natalie said he’s dating Dennis’s twin sister. She’s the blond one, right?”

I nodded.

“She’s cute,” said my mom.

That night, I barely slept. My entire body was on fire.

At school, I punished myself by watching them. They held hands. They kissed. They did . . . couple’s shit. And, God, of all the people he could have picked, he chose Debora. Debora who was a snotty little overachiever, the type of girl who reminded the teacher that there had been a homework assignment due. She’d intruded on our trip to Lake Quasipi and now she was intruding on my life. She may have been cordial to me a handful of times, but now she was dating Harvey and that seemed to cancel everything else out.

Whenever I saw him walking her to class or searching for her hand with his, as they shuffled down the hallways, I found myself plotting her demise. This wasn’t okay. He couldn’t be with someone, not so soon. I wanted to destroy her. But then I stopped myself, which surprised me. This little, minuscule spot of good inside of me told me that Harvey was happy, and anything I did to ruin her would ruin him. And that would be unforgiveable. Even if I did manage to ruin her and split the two of them up, what would I do then? I didn’t know how to be with Harvey.

Going to the café with Eric had been one of the few times he and I had gone out in public together. Typically, our time together was limited to our little fort under the bleachers and sweaty makeout sessions in the back of his rusted Range Rover. Eric had avoided me for a couple days after the incident at my house with Harvey. I didn’t go out of my way to track him down; I knew that in time Eric would find me.

He found me under the bleachers during third period. Plopping down next to me, he held out a mini sleeve of Oreo cookies from the vending machine. After the bell buzzed announcing the beginning of the period, Eric said, “So what’s the real deal with you and that Harvey guy?”

“We were friends.” I lay back on the gym floor. “Then he fell in love with me.” It wasn’t the whole truth, but it wasn’t a whole lie either, and I thought that more than fair.

Not talking to Harvey meant that if I wasn’t with Eric, I was alone, and when I was alone, Celeste always seemed to find me. It was always more of the same, empty threats and promises of revenge. You might want to watch your back. Don’t for a minute think you’ve gotten away with anything. Nothing she said could scare me because I didn’t have anything left to lose.

“Alice?” Eric said, snapping his fingers in front of my face. “Where are you, Allie Cat?” I hated that nickname. Eric blew on his mug of cider, gripping it with both hands.

“Sorry, what’d you say?”

“Are you going to be around for spring break?”

“No. Going to the beach with family.”

Silence sank between us, and I wondered why we were here and not pressing our bodies together in the back of his car, but he’d insisted on going somewhere to talk.

“What about you?” I asked. “Plans for spring break?” Talking and not just playing Go Fish or making out turned out to be almost uncomfortable.

“Kind of,” he said.

I’ll admit I didn’t know Eric very well. But I did know if he had something to say he always came right out and said it. “Kind of?”

“Yeah, we’re uh . . . moving.”

I sat up straight, looking directly at him. “What do you mean you’re moving?”

“My aunt’s job transferred her again.”