Thank You, Jeeves

. .it isn't plausible." " It is only necessary to induce Sergeant Voules to believe it, sir. What the constable may think is immaterial, owing to the fact that his lips are sealed." " But Voules wouldn't believe it for a minute." " Oh, yes, sir. I fancy that he is under the impression that it is a frequent practice of yours to sleep in sheds." Chuffy uttered a glad cry. " Of course. He'll just take it for granted that you've been mopping it up again." I was frigid. " Oh ? " I said, and you couldn't have described my voice as anything but caustic. " So I am to go down in the history of Chuff nell Regis as one of our leading dipsomaniacs ? " "

He may just think him potty," suggested Pauline. " That's right," said Chuffy. He turned to me pleadingly. " Bertie," he said, " you aren't going to tell me at this time of day that you have any objection to being considered ..."

' . . . Mentally negligible," said Pauline. " Exactly," said Chuffy. "

Of course you'll do it. What, Bertie Wooster ? Sacrifice himself to a little temporary inconvenience to save his friends ? Why, he jumps at that sort of job." " Springs at it," said Pauline. " Leaps at it," said Chuffy. " I've always thought he was a fine young fellow," said old Stoker. " I remember thinking so the first time I met him." " So did I,"

said Lady Chuffnell. " So different from so many of these modem young men." " I liked his face." II " I have always liked his face." My head was swimming a bit. It isn't often I get as good a Press as this, and the old salve was beginning to unman me. I tried feebly to stem the tide. " Yes, but listen . . ." " I was at school with Bertie Wooster," said Chuffy. " I like to think of it. At private school and also at Eton and after that at Oxford. He was loved by everybody." " Because of his wonderful, unselfish nature ? " asked Pauline. " You've absolutely hit it. Because of his wonderful, unselfish nature. Because when it was a question of helping a pal he would go through fire and water to do so. I wish I had a quid for every time I've seen him take the blame for somebody else's dirty work on his own broad shoulders."

" How splendid I " said Pauline. " Just what I'd have expected of him,"

said old Stoker. " Just," said Lady ChuffnelL " The child is the father of the man." " You would see him face a furious head master with a sort of dauntless look in those big blue eyes of his . . ." I held up a hand.

" Enough, Chuffy," I said. " Sufficient. I will go through this ghastly ordeal. But one word. When I come out, do I get breakfast ? " " You get the best breakfast Chuffnell Hall can provide." I eyed him searchingly.

" Kippers ? " " Schools of kippers." " Toast ? " " Mounds of toast." "

And coffee ? " " Pots." I inclined the head. " Well, mind I do," I said.

" Come, Jeeves, I am ready to accompany you." " Very good, sir. If I might be permitted to make an observation-- ? " " Yes, Jeeves ? " "It is a far, far better thing that you do than you have ever done, sir." "

Thank you, Jeeves." As I said before, there is nobody who puts these things more neatly than he does.

CHAPTER XXII JEEVES APPLIES FOR A SITUATION

THE sunlight poured into the small morning-room of Chuffnell Hall. It played upon me, sitting at a convenient table ; on Jeeves, hovering in the background ; on the skeletons of four kippered herrings; on a coffee-pot; and on an empty toast rack. I poured myself out the final drops of coffee and sipped thoughtfully. Recent events had set their seal upon me, and it was a graver, more mature Bertram Wooster who now eyed the toast rack and, finding nothing there, transferred his gaze to the man in attendance. " Who's the cook at the Hall now, Jeeves ? " " A woman of the name of Perkins, sir." " She dishes up a nifty breakfast.

Convey my compliments to her." " Very good, sir." I touched the cup to my lips. " All this is rather like the gentle sunshine after the storm, Jeeves." " Extremely like, sir." " And it was quite a storm, what ? " "

Very trying at times, sir." " Trying is the mot juste, Jeeves. I was thinking of my own trial at that very moment. I flatter myself that I am a strong man, Jeeves. I

am not easily moved by life's untoward happenings. But I'm bound to confess that it was an unpleasant experience coming up before Chuffy. I was nervous and embarrassed. A good deal of the awful majesty of the Law about old Chuffy. I didn't know he wore horned-rimmed spectacles." "

When acting as Justice of the Peace, invariably, I understand, sir. I gather that his lordship finds that they lend him confidence in his magisterial duties." " Well, I think someone ought to have warned me. I got a nasty shock. They change his whole expression. Make him look just like my Aunt Agatha. It was only by reminding myself that he and I had once stood in the same dock together at Bow Street, charged with raising Cain on Boat Race night, that I was enabled to maintain my sang froid.