The Eye of Zoltar

‘So who did take the Eye of Zoltar?’ asked Addie, calling for more custard.

‘I don’t know,’ I replied, ‘but whoever did has had six years to try to unlock its power, and I’m figuring they haven’t – we’d certainly have heard about it.’

‘Tell me if I’m pointing out the bleeding obvious,’ said the Princess, ‘but when did Able Quizzler die from that fall?’

‘It was … six years ago,’ I murmured.

‘And how long since Pirate Wolff got changed to lead?’

‘Six years.’

‘Is that important?’ asked Addie.

The Princess didn’t need to answer. I knew precisely what she was getting at. I got up and placed the last of our money on the table.

‘Where are we going?’ asked Addie.

‘We’re going to find some shovels,’ I said, ‘because the Princess just picked up on something we all missed.’

‘And then,’ added the Princess, ‘we’re going to the cemetery.’

I had no difficulty finding Able Quizzler’s grave again, and started to dig almost immediately, much to the outrage of the gravedigger, the same one we had met previously.

‘You can’t be doing tha’!’ he said. ‘We only ’cept deposits, not withdrawals!’

We ignored him and, after waving his arms at us for a while, he shambled off about as fast as he could go.

The ground was waterlogged and heavy, but we eventually unearthed a leaden foot, twisted and mildly flattened by the impact, about two feet beneath the surface.

‘Kevin Zipp might well have been right after all,’ I said as we continued to dig, ‘and this is my theory: Able Quizzler found his way to Sky Pirate Wolff’s lair, and as soon as the Eye was shown to him, he used the most easily accessible magic within the Eye to make his escape – in this case, a turning-to-lead gatekeeper. He prised the Eye from Pirate Wolff’s hand, then killed every pirate in his way using the Eye’s power before escaping on a Leviathan. But then the Eye’s gatekeeper spell did what gatekeeper spells are meant to do – protect the jewel. Quizzler was himself turned to lead, and now dead, fell from the Leviathan.’

‘And landed here, still – hopefully – clutching the Eye.’

‘Fingers crossed.’

We uncovered his torso, also deformed with the impact, and a minute or two later uncovered his leaden features, still fixed in a triumphant grin etched there six years before and at a height of ten thousand feet or so. I knew then that my theory was sound. Quizzler was killed by the Eye’s malevolence, just as he had achieved his lifelong quest.

‘There!’ said Addie as we brushed the dirt off Quizzler’s body to reveal his hand clenched around a large, pink jewel. Despite the ground being wet and muddy, the jewel seemed to repel the dirt and shone with a brightness that almost invited avariciousness. It was actually, I think, even bigger than a goose’s egg, and from somewhere deep inside the jewel there was a light – a pulsating glow, like that of a human pulse. It seemed that Zoltar’s evil will, the guiding force of the gem’s power, was still in residence. We’d found the Eye of Zoltar. But we were going to have to be very, very careful unless we wanted to end up like Quizzler – lead, and very dead.

We all stared at the jewel, hardly daring to breathe.

‘I’ve got no magic in me,’ said the Princess, ‘but even I can feel it – a sort of dark wickedness.’

‘I feel it too,’ said Addie, ‘and I’m also thinking that no one should touch it.’

I agreed with this and after a brief discussion I had the Princess go into town to buy an iron cooking pot, several large balls of string and as many candles as she could carry. And then, without touching the massive jewel, we prised it from Quizzler’s grasp and placed it in the pot surrounded by clay. Once this was done we bound the lid of the pot closed with string, then poured molten wax over the string to seal it tight. We then carried our treasure gently to the half-track, where it was lashed securely to the floor next to Rubber Colin. It was the most dangerous magical artefact that I had ever handled, and I wondered then about the wisdom of giving it to Shandar. But that was up to Moobin and the others to decide.

‘Okay, then,’ I said, ‘just one more thing to do and we’re heading home.’

‘I really hope it doesn’t involve going back into the Empty Quarter,’ said the Princess.

‘No, Cambrianopolis – to negotiate for Once Magnificent Boo’s release.’

Negotiations in Cambrianopolis