The Last Samurai

What’ll [still chuckling]: This is my stop. [Gets off at Farringdon—how like a man]

Hendekapus

[NO]

Dodekapus

[NO]

Treiskaidekapus

[Oh well]

Tessareskaidekapus

[You win some you lose some]

pentekaidekapus hekkaidekapus heptakaidekapus OKTOKAIDEKAPUS enneakaidekapus eikosapus

I never meant this to happen.

I meant to follow the example of Mr. Ma (father of the famous cellist), and I still don’t know where I went wrong. I did say though that if I knew for a fact that even 10 people would like to know how you teach a 4-year-old Greek I would explain it. 11 riders of the Circle Line have now said they would like to know this. I rather wish now that I had said 10 people not including people who think it is a marvellous idea because grammar & spelling not taught in schools, but it was an unconditional offer & if I say I will do a thing I try to do it.

It seems to me that the last time I approached this subject I had explained how I had taken a break from typing in an interview with John Denver & had been interrupted while reading Iliad 6 by L. The last thing I wanted was to be teaching a four-year-old Greek, and now the Alien spoke & its voice was mild as milk.

What is the Alien asks a reader.

The Alien is whatever you want to call the thing that finds specious reasons for cruelty and how do you expect me to finish with these constant interruptions.

And now the Alien spoke & its voice was mild as milk, and it said He’s just a baby.

And J. S. Mill said:

In the course of instruction which I have partially retraced, the point most superficially apparent is the great effort to give, during the years of childhood, an amount of knowledge in what are considered the higher branches of education, which is seldom acquired (if acquired at all) until the age of manhood.

And I said: NO NO NO NO NO

And Mr. Mill said:

The result of the experiment shows the ease with which this may be done,

And I said EASE

& he resumed implacably,

and places in a strong light the wretched waste of so many precious years as are spent in acquiring the modicum of Latin and Greek commonly taught to schoolboys; a waste which has led so many educational reformers to entertain the ill-judged proposal of discarding these languages altogether from general education. If I had been by nature extremely quick of apprehension, or had possessed a very accurate and retentive memory, or were of a remarkably active and energetic character, the trial would not be conclusive; but in all these natural gifts I am rather below than above par; what I could do, could assuredly be done by any boy or girl of average capacity and healthy physical constitution.

The Alien said it would be kinder to say no & I longed to believe it, for the ease with which a small child may be introduced to what are commonly considered the higher branches of education is nothing to the ease with which it may not. I thought: Well maybe he’ll just. I thought: Well.

So I gave L a little table for the alphabet & said there’s the alphabet & he looked perplexed. When I learned the language the first thing we were given was a list of words like φιλοσοφíα θεολογíα νθρωπολογíα & so on and we would see the similarity to philosophy theology anthropology and get excited, this type of word tends not to turn up in Hop on Pop & so is not very helpful for teaching a 4-year-old. So I said a lot of the letters were the same and when he still looked perplexed I explained patiently—

There are a lot of Greek letters that are like English letters. See if you can read this, and I wrote on a piece of paper:

ατ

And he said at.

And I wrote down βατ and he said bat.

And I wrote down εατ and he said eat.

ατε. ate. ιτ. it. κιτ. kit. τοε. toe. βοατ. boat. βυτ. but. αβουτ. about.

And I said That’s good.

And I said There are some other letters that are different, and I wrote down γ = g, δ = d, λ = 1, μ = m, ν = n, π = p, ρ = r, & σ = s & I said see if you can read these.

I wrote down γατε and he said Gate!

And I wrote down δατε and he said Date!

And I wrote down λατε and he said Late!

ματε. Mate! ρατε. Rate! λετ Let μετ Met νετ Net πετ Pet σετ Set!!!!!!

The Alien said that that was enough for today.

Mr. Mill said his father had started him on cards with Greek vocables at the age of three and that what he had done could assuredly be done by any boy or girl of average capacity and healthy physical constitution.

Mr. Ma said that was far too much for one day & that too much material had been covered in a superficial manner without being thoroughly mastered.

I said I think that’s enough for one day

& he said NO! NO NO NO NO

So I wrote down ξ = x. ζ = z.

μιξ. Mix! λιξ. Lix—oh Licks! πιξ Picks! στιξ Sticks! ζιπ Zip!

I said Now you know the sound H makes, and he said Huh.