The Return of The Stainless Steel Rat

I spun on my heel and exited. Corona was waiting by the door.

"We'll meet here in eight hours. I'll have a plan by then and I'll let you know what I need. All right?"

"You're the boss," he said, shambling off, and then calling back over his shoulder. "Plenty of empty transit passenger cabins on M deck if you want to shut your eyes while you are making your plans."

"Just what I had in mind." I picked up my spacesuit and the rest of my equipment and headed for the elevators. I punched for M deck, exited there - and went straight to the emergency stairs.

"Well done, Jim," I congratulated myself, since no one else was there to do the job. Nor did I want anyone there at this moment. "As Dr.Putz said, this computer is a smarty. It must be eavesdropping on everything said in the public rooms."

It might also be eavesdropping on me in the stairwell I realized. And shut up. It should have a hard job listening to my thoughts. Corona had revealed that all of the previous attempts on the computer had been known to him. So they must have been discussed, planned in public. And been overheard. Well, that wasn't going to happen to Slippery Jim diGriz, not for nothing named Slippery! I had slipped away, the computer would not be expecting an assault yet. By the time it woke up to what was happening I would have put it to sleep forever. But how?

I sat down on the metal stairs and flipped through the deck plans. The central computer was located, as you might very well imagine, in the centre of the satellite. Which was ideal for the computer, but not so good for anyone trying to sneak up on it. I traced the various courses the other hopefuls had taken. All very imaginative. And all ending in the same way. And all complex. There had to be a simple and quick way to get near the thing. But there wasn't. Instead of all the doors, hatches, floors and entrances, I wanted to get directly to it. Bore a hole straight down with a super laser? Good idea. Only I didn't have a super laser. I started to throw the plans aside - then pulled them back when something caught my eye. Of course! The hole was already there!

Drilled right through the satellite. From top to bottom. Passing right through the computer room. I permitted myself a chuckle of admiration and pleasure. You're a bright boy, Jim! I traced the opening with my finger.

The elevator shaft.

Nor would I make any attempt to reach the computer by elevator. That would be suicide. It was the shaft alone that I wanted. The magnetized boots on my spacesuit would get me there. To think is to act. Fast and smooth, that's the Stainless Steel Rat's motto.

I pulled on the spacesuit, checked my equipment, then went down the stairs to the lowest deck. The deck plans came in handy then because this was a machinery level. I slipped between the humming generators and clattering machines, working my way towards the bottom of elevator shaft 19. It was there, right where it was indicated on the diagram, with its number painted directly over the inspection hatch. All going according to plan!

I unclipped the hatch and lowered it gently to the deck, then poked my head through. Darkness. My light flashed up the shaft and I was aware of the bottom of the elevator far above. The way was clear to computer central. I did not stand around pondering the dangers, but when instantly into action - climbing inside and raising my boot and pressing it against the wall where it clung to the steel with magnetic cohesion. The gravity here was orientated towards the base of the shaft which made it difficult. But not impossible. I hung head downwards from the boots, uncomfortable but necessary. I switched off the current in the bottom boot and shifted it above the other. Current on, magnetized, stuck there. Then the other boot, repeating the process over and over.

And slowly, one clumsy step at a time I rose up the shaft.

It was hard work and tiring work. I was perhaps halfway there and panting loudly when I had to rest. I hung from the boots, gasping in air - when I heard it. A humming sound. What did it mean? With sudden and horrified realization I pointed my light upwards.

The computer had detected my presence in the shaft. It was sending the elevator down to crush me!

I permitted myself one instant of panic, to promote the flow of adrenalin, then clamped down hard with my mental control. No panic, Jim! You've been in tight spots before. Think - don't react blindly.

I couldn't retreat and reach the bottom of the shaft in time. I would be crushed if I tried. Could I force open one of the doors and get out at a different level? An unknown; I had no time to make experiments. So if I couldn't go down, or out the side, there was only one direction left. Up! I would have to tackle the elevator itself!