The Secret to Success

Science was not my favorite subject in school and I think that had a lot to do with the fact that it was so complex. I remember thinking there are quite a few theories to memorize and after about twenty or more I kind of figured, this might not be the subject I want to spend the rest of my life studying. But I must admit, I somewhat liked the whole symbiosis lesson because I could use it to gauge any relationship. It was simple and straight to the point. All relationships, whether the relationship was between you and your boys or with a female, fell into one of three categories.

When I got to college I used the concepts from symbiosis to decide which relationship to invest in and which ones to cut. My relationship with Irv (Black) was a no brainer. I knew I was not on his level. He clearly had more to offer in the relationship then I did. For one, he finished high school and was clearly more intelligent than I was. Two, he had some leadership experience because he served as a youth leader for the Urban League in his community. And to top it off, he had impeccable administrative skills. My only challenge was to make sure I did not fall into either the commensalism or parasitism category. I knew it was not about equal giving; it was about equal sacrifice. I had a slight competitive edge because I knew what most people did not know; even the great ones need a competent sidekick. From time-to-time Batman needed Robin, the Long Ranger needed Tonto and Lavern needed Shirley. So between the codes of ethics I learned in the hood and what I knew about mutualism, I knew this relationship could create a dynamic duo.

Stay in Your Lane – Don’t try to do more than you are capable of doing.

I could not have written the script any better. Three months into the school year, Black and Tre (Melvin Hadden III) called me in on an executive meeting. To this day I am not sure how Tre became a part of the team but just know Tre elevated Black and me from a dynamic duo to a tenacious trio. They wanted to let me know they felt God was leading us to do something big on campus, but they did not know exactly what it was. So Tre initiated a fast. He believed that fasting was a way of clearing the mind from all distractions so we could get in tune with the mind of God. So the plan was to fast from everything but water for seven days. I don’t think I ever mentioned it to either of them but I was scared to death. I did not grow up in church, so fasting was a foreign concept. It wasn’t that I did not understand the premise behind fasting; my problem was I could not understand why someone would deliberately want to go without eating for seven days. Why would anyone voluntarily inflict that type of pain upon himself (or herself); it didn’t make sense to me—especially since I had already been homeless and starving on the streets of Detroit just a year prior. Despite how ludicrous the idea sounded at first, I consented. And all I can say is that three months after the fast we became a part of a groundbreaking, life-changing program that not only took the campus by storm but would also eventually transform our lives and impact the world. It was amazing to see what was birthed from a small meeting of three and a seven-day fast. The student lead initiative would be known as the Bell Tower Ministry. The concept itself wasn’t new; we just took a familiar idea and added a few components to enhance it. Black was the president and founder, Tre was the vice president and our spiritual advisor, and I was the glue guy who kept us all together. By the grace of God, I was never jealous of the relationship between Black and Tre. I never once thought I should be the vice president because I knew Black first. Besides I knew Tre was a better number two man than I was and that I could best serve the squad from a supporting role. Honestly speaking, Tre’s presence took us to a new level. He was so different from Black in that he added a spiritual and meek dimension that was missing. Tre was way more levelheaded and methodical than Black and I, who tended to be a bit more radical and loud. Even though my contributions were less noticeable, they were still critical to our ministry’s growth.