The World According to Bob

Another positive about being in Covent Garden, of course, was that life was never, ever dull there. I soon remembered that the place had a rhythm and life all of its own. The busiest time of the day was the evening rush, around 7pm, when hordes of people headed home from work and an even bigger horde flooded in to visit the bars, restaurants, theatres and opera houses.

Watching the world go by from our position on Neal Street, it was never difficult to spot who was headed where. You could spot the kids who were out for a night’s clubbing a mile away. They were all mini-skirts and towering heels, leather jackets and hair gel. The opera lovers were generally the best dressed, often with the men in black tie and the women in grand evening dresses with a generous helping of bling thrown in for good measure. You could hear some of them rattling down the road in the direction of the Piazza and the Royal Opera House. The area was full of characters. As we settled back into the routine, we seemed to attract more than our fair share of them once more.

One afternoon, a couple of weeks into summer, I noticed an unfamiliar face on the pavement a few yards away from us.

It wasn’t uncommon for other people to set up in the area, trying to earn a few quid. I didn’t have any problem with that, as long as they didn’t interfere with our livelihood. The only rivals who really annoyed me were ‘chuggers’, the freelance charity workers who would swarm around an area from time to time, pestering people.

I wasn’t being hypocritical. We all had a living to earn, and I had been a bit pushy myself when I was selling The Big Issue. But the chuggers took things too far and their behaviour could be so downright rude and intrusive it was bordering on harassment.

This guy was definitely not one of them, however. He was dark skinned and dressed quite smartly, in a suit. He had an odd-looking basket, which he placed on the floor. I guessed he was some kind of street entertainer, but I had no idea what to expect.

I was intrigued and sat there watching him for a few moments, hoping he might ease the boredom of another day. I wasn’t disappointed. He had soon dipped into his basket and produced a yellowish snake which he then proceeded to drape around his neck. I was no expert on snakes, but I’d have described it as an albino python. It was quite thick and about three feet long. He then started playing around with it, asking for donations from passers-by.

‘Look Bob, we’ve got a snake charmer,’ I smiled as I watched the impressive-looking creature coiling its way around the guy.

Bob was weighing up the situation carefully, but it was obvious he didn’t really understand what was happening. We were a good thirty feet away so he couldn’t really see properly, so he settled back into his favourite position in the shade and started his afternoon snooze.

The guy had been there for about forty minutes or so when he came over to say hello. He still had the snake draped on his neck as if it was a rather large piece of jewellery.

‘OK, guys, how are you today?’ he said, in a strong accent that I guessed was Portuguese or possibly Brazilian.

Bob had been dozing away in the afternoon sun but perked up and took a good look at the curious visitor. I could tell his mind was hard at work, trying to work out what this creature was — and whether it was a welcome presence in his world? It didn’t take him long to reach his conclusion.

As Bob tilted his head forward to take a better look, the snake decided to stick out its long, forked tongue and deliver a rather scary hiss. It was like something out of The Jungle Book.

Bob completely freaked. He made this really loud, yowling sound and jumped up at me imploring me to stick him on my shoulders. I was pretty sure that if I hadn’t had his harness connected to me he would have bolted and run off, as he’d done once over in Angel, when an aggressive dog had lunged at him.

‘Sorry, dude, didn’t mean to scare your cat,’ the guy said, realising what he’d done and sliding the snake off his shoulders. ‘I’m going to move away from here and see how I get on further down the road.’

Bob spent the rest of the afternoon on edge. He was so paranoid about meeting another snake that he kept attacking the straps on my rucksack. He’d been sitting on this rucksack for years and had never had a problem. But suddenly anything that reminded him of the yellow python was to be treated with extreme suspicion. He kept grabbing the straps in his teeth and flicking them in the air, as if to test whether they were alive or not.