Английский разговорный шутя. 100 анекдотов на все случаи жизни

Study the words and expressions given below:

upcoming приближающийся

ridiculous нелепый

to kick off футб. делать первый удар в начале игры; зд. сленг умереть, сыграть в ящик

Exercises to the text

1. Answer the questions to the text:

1. What were the guys talking about?

2. Why did they think the upcoming wedding ridiculous?

3. What name for a wedding of this sort do they have in the family?

4. Was the boss a good football player?

2. Fill in the blanks with the words from the text:

1. Two guys are talking about their boss\'s _______.

2. It\'s _______, he\'s 93 years old.

3. What _______ of a wedding is that?

4. What do you _______ it?

5. The girl\'s waiting for him to _______!

3. Match the two parts of the sentences:

4. Match the words and expressions in the left column to those in the right one:

5. Translate from Russian into English:

1. Ей только 26 лет!

2. У нас в семье есть название для этого.

3. Мы называем это футбольной свадьбой.

Revise English Grammar Один из участников разговора обозначен в тексте как The other… Проверьте свои навыки использования прилагательного other и производных от него слов another, the other, others. При необходимости обратитесь к грамматическому справочнику (раздел 28).

6. Fill in the blanks with missing words; follow the directions given in brackets:

1. He has divorced recently, and he just wants to get himself (другую) _______ wife.

2. All (другие) _______ wives that he has had were also much younger than he was.

3. (Еще одна) _______ wedding, and he will really kick off.

4. Two guys turned up at the wedding; one was the bestman, (другой) _______ was his friend.

5. About half a hundred people invited to the wedding managed to get into the church; (другие) _______ had to wait outside.

7. Render the joke.

Section 26 Happy birthday present

A fellow was talking to his buddy, and he said, «I don\'t know what to get my wife for her birthday. She has everything, and besides, she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I\'m stumped.»

His buddy said, «I have an idea. Why don\'t you make up a certificate saying she can have 60 minutes of great sex, any way that she wants it. If you did it, she\'d probably be thrilled.»

So the fellow did.

The next day his buddy asked, «Well? Did you take my suggestion?»

«Yes, I did,» said the fellow.

«…And did she like it?» his buddy asked.

"Oh yes! She jumped up, thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out the door yelling, \'I\'ll be back in an hour!!!\' "