Ask for Me Tomorrow

Dear Ethel:

I don’t know how to start this letter because I shouldn’t be writing it — not to you of all people. I treated you rotten. You have every right and reason to tear this up before you go any further. But please don’t. I haven’t anyone else to turn to. I am locked in this terrible place which is so terrible you couldn’t bear to come inside the gate. I remember that day we went to the pound to claim Angel, how you cried just seeing the animals locked up. Well now I’m one of them...

Gilly said, “Who was Angel?”

“Our Yorkshire terrier.”

“I didn’t know B. J. ever had a dog.” It was such a small thing, completely unimportant, but it bothered her. It made her realize that he’d had a whole life before she even met him, that he’d been married to Ethel twice as long as to her.

I’m in this filthy cage Ethel and I didn’t do anything to hurt people. I just thought it was a good idea to bring some prosperity to that God forsaken village I was stuck in. Why am I always being stuck in places? It must be lack of character like you told me once. It really hurt me your saying that. I was never sure what character was so how could I get any.

I keep wishing I could start over or at least go back to the point where I began making bad mistakes. You are the only woman I ever truly loved and admired and respected. I could never live up to your standards. None of the other women had class like you Ethel. That’s why they appealed to me I guess because they were no better than I was which wasn’t much...

Gilly’s hands had begun to tremble. The paper made little rustling sounds like evil whispers. “He was desperate. People tell lies when they’re desperate.”

“Or truths.”

“There’s not a word of truth in—”

“Go on reading.”