Berries and Greed

My mom… Well, she’d taken off when I was so tiny that I had no idea what she even looked like. I had no memories of her. And my dad was just a piece of shit. Violet was a good person, but I knew she didn’t really think so herself. I knew she regretted some of the choices and mistakes she’d made.

I suddenly remembered what she’d said to me on my last night at the cult. “Sometimes I wish we’d left when your dad brought you here. Gone out into the world so you could experience a normal childhood. But I was scared.”

An unexpected swell of anger toward her rose. I’d been scared too. I’d been terrified. My dad had sucked, but he’d still been my dad. And he’d just left me there, on the top of that hill, in front of those enormous doors, and taken off back down those stairs with nothing more than, “Ask for your Aunt Violet” as his parting words.

I knew she hadn’t been expecting to suddenly become my parent, but she could’ve left the cult with me then so I had a shot at a normal life. She should have. She’d done her best to give me an education, but my childhood had been so lonely. And strange. Even then, I’d known I was living in a strange place. I’d known that other kids didn’t live like that.

As quickly as the anger rose, it drained out of me and guilt took its place. Violet had done her best. She’d loved me and kept me safe. She’d raised me to be strong and independent.

And I understood her reluctance to leave the cult. The outside world hadn’t been all that kind to her. Staying there had kept her away from the temptation of slipping back into her old ways. Maybe I would’ve been worse off if we’d left. Addiction could skew people’s priorities, make them more likely to do things they normally wouldn’t. I definitely would’ve been worse off if we’d been living alone in the city and Violet had ended up going back to prison for something, or getting hurt for running with the wrong people, or any number of things.

She’d done what she thought was right for both of us. There was no point getting bitter about it now—thinking about all the what-ifs and what I might have been doing at this point in my life if I hadn’t spent most of it in that compound.

You probably would have never met Greid.

The uncomfortable feelings melted away as I focused on his face again, my body relaxing under the mound of blankets that covered us both. That was true. I probably would’ve gone my entire life without ever even passing him on the street. It wasn’t like he went out much, and it wasn’t like I would’ve ever come to this part of the city, where all the well-off demiurgus lived.

I refused to let myself start thinking sappy things like, maybe you were just waiting there for him. I didn’t believe in fate. I believed in people deciding their own futures. But now that I was here with him… it felt right.

I’d made the right decision, agreeing to move in here with him.

Now I just had to decide what I wanted to do next.

Just as I was about to close my eyes and savour lying in this little nest with him, tucked away from the rest of the world for a while longer, the blaring sound of a horn made me jump out of my skin.

Greid’s eyes flew open. He squawked at the sight of me so close, jerking his head back and smacking it into the wall. Groaning, he fumbled under the blankets before pulling out his phone, and I winced as the horn sound got twice as loud before he finally turned it off.

“Sorry,” he croaked. “Alarm.”

“That’s oka—Wait. Shit.” I bolted up. “What time is it? I’m meant to go back to the bar at about ten-thirty to give Mani my information.”

“Don’t worry, it’s only eight-thirty.” Greid yawned, jaw opening super wide. “I set some alarms last night so we wouldn’t miss it. See?”

He turned his phone screen toward me. I peered at it, snorting when I saw the words berry job thing under the 8.30 a.m. alarm, plus about twenty other alarms set after it in five-minute increments.

“Berry?” I poked his shoulder.

“I was super high.” He yawned again. “Looked right when I typed it.”

“Why are there a million alarms set?”

“Because I sleep through them. I’m really good at stopping them within a split second of them going off without even waking up.”

I laughed. “I bet that’s the quickest you move all day, huh?”

“I’m just saying, if it was an Olympic sport…” Greid sat up and stretched as best he could in the tiny, enclosed space. “So, um… I hope you managed to sleep okay in here. Uh, sorry if I took up too much room in the night. Or kicked you.”

Kicked me? “I slept really well.”

He grinned at me, yellow eyes still hooded with drowsiness. “That would’ve been the shade.”

No. It was you.

Flushing, I started pulling all the blankets off me. “I better go get ready. The appointment at the bank is at nine-thirty, right?”